


Normal People

by falling4hournite



Category: Stargirl (TV 2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, F/M, Fluff, but mainly angst, senior year/college
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 33,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25731859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/falling4hournite/pseuds/falling4hournite
Summary: In an AU Blue Valley High with no superheros or villains, Rick and Beth, on polar opposite ends of their school's social scene, begin an intense, secret relationship.This fic will follow Rick and Beth over several years from their senior year in high school through college. As they grow into themselves, their relationship will face many ups and downs. However, they seem to always come back together as their love for each other never wanes.Highly based off of the book/tv show Normal People!
Relationships: Beth Chapel/Rick Tyler
Comments: 43
Kudos: 33





	1. Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is gonna be long af!! I anticipate it to be about 13 chapters each as long as this one. I wrote this chapter in one night because I was so inspired. I hope I can keep that energy up! I hope you all enjoy! This is definitely not the Blue Valley we know but our two main still have the same perfectly complementary personalities. You will notice they are a little bit different than in the show. This I explain by the difference in their familial relationships which you will soon see.

“Mrs. Brooks!” Beth Chapel’s hand was raised high in the air as she tried to get the attention of her history teacher.

She heard the soft snickers of her classmates but held her head up high as she waved her hand a little bit in the air.

“Yes Beth.” Mrs. Brooks responded sounding slightly exasperated.

“Well ma’m. I have to respectfully disagree with what you said about the Vietnam War. America _did_ lose we just lost and didn’t want to admit it so we left before it was truly official.”

“Well Beth I have to disagree.” Mrs. Brooks replied unswayed.

“Why?” Beth pressed on

“Well...I...” Mrs. Brooks stammered trying to come up with a response.

Rick Tyler sat in the back of class looking discretely at the scene unfolding before him.

Beth Chapel was the smartest girl in their year. She was a force in the most positive interpretation of the word. However, despite being incredibly sweet and kind she had no friends. Her confidence, talkative nature, and unrelenting willingness to be herself caused her to be an outcast.

Rick’s best friend Henry poked him as Beth continued to explain her point whispering snidely, “There she goes again.”

Rick turned and nodded at Henry half-heartedly, secretly impressed at how Beth held her own against the teacher.

Suddenly the bell rang interrupting their spirited debate.

As Rick and his buddies passed by Beth, Henry teased her cruely, “Hey Beth I know something that _you_ definitely have not lost.”

His friends snickered as Rick bristled at the malicious comment but remained silent.

He watched a glimmer of hurt pass in Beth’s eyes before a steely look replaced it. Her voice was sickly sweet as she responded, “You would know with how many times you’ve _tried_ to win it.”

“OOOOhh shit” Rick’s friend Cam exclaimed after Beth’s spot on roast. Rick‘s other friends, Cindy and Jessie, laughed at Henry’s bright red face.

Beth just walked on past them. She headed down the hallway, putting her airpods in and walked head high as if she could spare them no additional thoughts.

Rick stared at her, transfixed, as she walked down the hall.

‘What a girl’

* * *

After school and soccer practice Rick walked up to Beth’s large house and rang her doorbell.

He heard a soft pattering of feet before Beth yanked the door open.

“Hey Rick!” Beth greeted him with a happy smile. The first genuine one he had received today. She was no longer in the drab school uniform and instead sported a bright yellow shirt and daisy embroidered jean shorts.

“Hey Beth” Rick replied slightly nodding his head.

“Come on in. Your mom’s in the kitchen!”

Rick followed Beth over to the grand white kitchen in her house.

His mom worked as a housekeeper at Beth’s house. He just recently started picking her up from work after school and soccer practice.

Rick’s mom smiled at him when he came in, “Hey baby how was school?”

Rick gave her light hug. He was happy to see her look a bit more grounded than she did this morning, “It was good mom. How’s your day?”

“Pretty good as well. I’m gonna go gather my stuff and I’ll be ready to go.”

Rick’s mom shuffled out giving Beth’s arm a friendly squeeze as she passed her by.

Awkwardness filled the room as Beth and Rick were left alone.

Both hesitantly made eye contact before looking away again shyly. Finally, Beth spoke up, “Hey, how was your SAT?”

Rick rustled his hair, “Uh pretty good actually. I actually got the highest score in science in our year.”

Beth raised her eyebrow and giggled surprised to hear the ever-brooding Rick brag on himself.

“Well that’s great! I was told I had the highest score in the entire class. Not surprising.” Beth teased lightly.

Rick shook his head his eyes light with amusement, “You trying say you’re smarter than me Chapel?”

Beth met his eyes directly as she confidently proclaimed, “Yes” and then she looked away muttering, “smarter than everyone.”

Rick laughed in light disbelief at Beth’s confidence in herself. She was amazingly bold yet still humble in a way that was just authentically _her_.

He retorted with a smirk on his lips, “Well I still have the best grade in Chemistry class.”

Beth met his teasing gaze with her own one.

Just then Rick’s mom reentered the room. Rick immediately started to move to the door to leave, ignoring a pointed look from his mom.

Mrs. Tyler walked over to Beth giving her a hug, “Bye Beth! You be good and tell your mom I’ll finish cleaning upstairs tomorrow.”

Beth nodded smiling, “Thank you Mrs. Tyler, bye! Bye Rick!”

But Rick was already pretty much out the door. He gave a half-hearted wave and practically speed walked to his car. He opened the door for his mom to get in before hopping in the driver seat and speeding off.

Rick was terribly uncomfortable. He was surprised to feel that his heart was racing. Talking to Beth totally set all his senses on fire. On top of that, he couldn’t help but linger on how beautiful she looked out of the school uniform.

‘Beth normally is pretty but she looked radiant at home.’

Rick’s mom interrupted his thoughts, “Rick why’d you run out of there like that?”

Rick continued to look at the road and just shrugged in response.

She sighed, “Rick you need to be nice to Beth. She’s such a sweet sensitive girl. And sometimes I think terribly lonely.”

Rick nodded. Sometimes he and Beth seemed like they were worlds apart in school. But at her home standing in front of him in the kitchen, he was stricken with just how close they’ve always been to each other.

They pulled into their house driveway. A modest house much smaller than the one Beth lived in, but also much warmer.

As Rick walked in, he was met with the large family portrait of him, his mom and his father.

Rick’s mom placed her hand on her late husband’s picture before continuing on into the kitchen. Rick stared at the picture for a second before murmuring, “Hey dad” and walking over to his room to do his homework.

He spent the night trying to push away the thoughts of Beth that kept slowly creeping into his mind.

* * *

The next day at school Beth was reading at the lunch table by herself. She was humming lightly to herself when she felt a presence lean next to her breaking into her personal space.

‘ _Henry_ ’

“Watcha reading Beth?” Henry asked slyly.

Beth looked up but not at him. She saw that his friends were at their normal nearby table watching like a pack of hyenas. Except for Rick. He looked mainly expressionless but perhaps she saw a hint of something else there? Worry? She couldn’t tell for sure.

She turned to face Henry. His red hair still as bright as ever. Beth wondered what could’ve happened to change her kind elementary school friend into this sleazy guy next to her.

“I’m just reading a Nancy Drew mystery Henry.”

Henry nodded and sat down right next to her. He leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Your cluster fuck of a life isn’t enough of a mystery to you?”

Beth bristled uncomfortably and couldn’t help but glance at Rick. He still sat unmoving in his chair, though he looked very tense.

‘That’s fine. I’ve never relied on anyone but myself anyway.’

Beth turned her face. Letting it remain just a few inches away from Henry’s, “Go back to your goons Henry.”

She moved to turn back into her book and pointedly ignored him until he got up and left her alone.

Beth couldn’t help but look back up at Henry’s table again. He was laughing with most of them but then she made eye contact with Rick. He was still staring at her, this time she could see the concern.

Beth felt herself warm a little at the attention and stuck her head back down in her book quickly before she blushed.

‘Dammit Beth really? When are you going to get over this crush?’

Beth has had a crush on Rick Tyler for as long as she can remember. They never talked, but he barley talked to anyone. Even his friends. Still though they were both always at the top of their class and he was also quite a good soccer player so she noticed him a lot. As did everyone else in their school. But she had always felt there was an energy between them. However, she chalked it up to wishful thinking.

She shook her thoughts away and focused back on the case that she had solved 40 pages ago. Still waiting for Nancy to catch up with her.

* * *

“Mom I think I want to go into medicine.”

After school, Beth tried to get her mom’s attention from where she sat in her home office to little avail.

Her mom half-heartedly looked up and nodded, “Sounds good sweetie. Make sure you ace all your exams and I’m sure you’ll be set.”

She returned back to her work.

Beth knew that was all she was going to get from her. She left the office and began walking to the stairs so she could go to her room.

Just then Beth’s father strolled into the home. Beth smelled the liquor on him and bristled not knowing what to expect today.

“Hey Bethhh” he slurred before collapsing on the couch in the living room.

Beth relaxed and walked over to him. She pulled his shoes off and rolled him over lightly just in case he threw up. Then she threw a nearby blanket over him before heading back upstairs to her room and locking the door.

* * *

At Rick’s house he and his mom were having a spirited argument at the kitchen table.

Rick poked at his spaghetti while his mom pushed him to think about his future,

“Rick you are so smart you just need some direction. Have you thought about what you want your life to look like 10 years from now?”

“Mom I barely know what I want tomorrow.”

Rick’s mom sighed frustratedly, “Rick you’re 4 months away from graduating. College deadlines for scholarships are in a month. You’re father would be so disappointed in me if I didn’t get you on the right track. He only ever wanted the best for you...”

Rick’s mom began tearing up. Immediately Rick grabbed her hand, hating seeing her sad. It had been 11 years since his dad died in a car crash and his mom never was fully the same afterwards. She was in the car when he died, and she’s never spoken to Rick about what she saw. But he knew it haunted her to this day.

“Mom it’s going to be alright. I’ll figure it out. I promise.”

Rick’s mom nodded squeezing his hand before letting go of it and standing up.

“I think I need to rest now baby. I’m gonna go lay down.”

Rick nodded as she left the kitchen. He stared at her barely eaten plate of spaghetti admonishing himself.

‘You have to get it together. For her sake.’

* * *

_the next day_

“Dad, it’s pouring and I’m a little late can you please give me a ride to school?” Beth pleaded with her hungover father. Slightly nudging him trying to fully wake him up from his drunken place on the couch from last night.

“Can’t your mom take you?” Mr. Chapel grumbled.

“No, she already left.”

“Can’t you drive yourself?”

“No dad. No one’s taught me.”

Beth’s dad stared at her blankly.

“There’s an umbrella in the laundry room. Just use that.”

He turned around burying his face in the back of the couch.

Beth stared at him dejectedly before moving to go get the umbrella.

The walk to school was grueling. It took 5 minutes for Beth’s umbrella to get completely inverted by the windy rain. She spent the rest of the 25-minute walk holding herself to try to keep warm in the downpour.

By the time she got to school, 15 minutes late, she was completely drenched head to toe.

Beth shuffled into English class with the dreaded Mr. Gambler.

When she opened the door, she felt every eye in the class turn to look at her.

Most of the class became completely silent but then she heard Henry’s crew begin to laugh.

Beth was sure she must look like a wet rat. Her normally bouncy fro was drenched pulled down as if she had just stepped out of the shower. Her broken umbrella dangled from her hand. Her clothes stuck to her feeling as uncomfortable as wet jeans. But most of all Beth just felt tired. She couldn’t even muster up a fake smile.

“Ms. Chapel, you’re late. Please take a seat so I can continue on with my class.” Mr. Gambler said unsympathetically.

Beth nodded and moved to her seat.

She heard Henry’s and his crew’s snickers, but she also felt a pair of watchful eyes on her. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew who it was but today she felt too tired to care.

In all his years knowing Beth, Rick had never seen her look so exhausted and sad. He felt his heart involuntarily ache at the sight.

It was this ache that brought him to her at the end of the school day. She was standing by her locker, much drier, packing her bag to go home. 

Rick stood behind her somewhat shyly before getting her attention, “Hey Beth”

Beth turned around surprised that he was talking to her, “Hey Rick”

“Seems like you’re having a rough day today.”

Beth agreed, “Maybe just a bit.”

Rick nodded not knowing what to say and struggled lamely replying, “Well I hope it gets better.”

Beth giggled and immediately Rick felt himself get warm. It was the first time he’d heard her laugh today. An oddity for the normally chipper girl.

“Since when did you start acting like you’re my friend. You’re not that kind of guy.” Beth said lightly.

Rick knew she was right. He really wasn’t. But somehow he wanted to be for her, “Maybe I am.”

Beth shook her head, “I know you and your friends hate me. Henry, Cam, Cindy, Jessie and you. I know it. It’s a shame too because you’re the only person in this school that talks to me.”

Rick shook his head in disbelief, “I don’t hate you.”

Beth’s eyes sparkled a little. Before she awkwardly admitted to him, “Well that’s good. I would hate for the boy I like to hate me.”

Both of them were shocked at the words that came out of her mouth.

Beth blushed looking down while Rick tried to understand if she meant what she said.

‘Boy she likes? She likes me? Or maybe she means as a friend?’’

His mind short circuited and all he could do was mutter out, “uh well I gotta go to practice. I’ll see you later.”

Beth just nodded, trying not to die of embarrassment.

* * *

Despite being a social pariah at school Beth loved attending school events. It gave her an excuse to stay away from her house and it made her feel more connected to the community. Tonight, Blue Valley High was playing soccer against a neighboring team at the other team’s home.

Rick was completely in his element. She watched as he ran and dodged competitors up and down the field. His skill only surpassed by his natural swagger.

Beth was at the edge of her seat watching excitedly as he made his way to the other team’s goal. He passed to Henry who passed to Cam who then passed back to Rick. Rick then slammed the ball sending it soaring into the goal.

Beth jumped up on her feet, as did everyone in attendance for Blue Valley, cheering on the team. Beth watched Rick, Henry and Cam hug laughing. Rick looked so good his hair wet with sweat and a large smile gracing his face. The smile softened his features and drew her to him like a bug to light.

Her joy faltered when she saw Jessie, one of Blue Valley’s cheerleaders and the girl she’s pretty sure has a thing for Rick, run up and hug him.

Rick half-heartedly squeezed her back before moving to go get water.

Blue Valley won the game 3-2. On the fan bus Beth sat by herself in the middle row. She was staring out the window thinking about what might meet her when she got home, when she felt someone plop down next to her.

She turned and was met with the handsome side profile of Rick Tyler.

Beth blushed and turned to face the window again.

They spent the whole bus ride in silence. Both warmed and nervous by the others presence.

* * *

_the next day_

“Hey Beth. I’m here to get my mom.”

“Yeah she’s just finishing up the laundry. You can come on in to wait.”

Rick walked in and this time turned towards the large library in Beth’s house. He picked up the book that was laying on a nearby table table, Fahrenheit 451.

Beth stood nearby nervously in a green hoodie and shorts . Her hair was pulled up in a bun with a few curly strands softly framing her face.

She held her hands in front of herself nervously before offering, “Hey you played really well yesterday.”

Rick looked at her nodding a small appreciative smile at the corner of his lips, “Thank you Beth. That’s so nice of you to say.”

Beth rolled her eyes at his teasing crossing her arms underneath her chest, “You know I’m the nicest person in Blue Valley. Just can’t help it.”

Rick chuckles lightly still holding the book.

“Uh you can borrow it if you want.” Beth offered.

“Oh it’s okay. I’ve already read it. Good book, you should read it.”

Beth giggles, “I have.”

Rick felt himself get a little red ‘Duh this is her house.’

Beth continued, “Do your friends know you read so much? I doubt they really read much at all.”

Rick shook his head placing the book back down on the table, “They’re really not into the same things you and I are.”

Beth rolled her eyes, “Well I know what Henry is interested in. His brain must only have enough space to think of one topic and apparently he’s chosen sex.”

Rick became a little defensive, “I may not approve of all the things they do. But they’re still my friends.”

Beth, unphased by Rick’s mood change, let her arms uncross and dangle next to her.

Rick noticed then how small she looked in her oversized hoodie. The way her hair was pulled up today elongated her neck. Rick found himself wondering what it would be like to kiss that neck. To softly bite it and feel her throaty moan through his lips.

At that moment Rick decided he wanted to know the truth.

Rick blurted out softly, “When you said you liked me. Did you mean as friends or something more?”

Beth blushed but did not back down. ‘What do I have to lose?’

“Something more.” She murmured.

Rick felt his heart clench and his stomach do somersaults. But his mind was weary.

“I feel something for you Beth. I just don’t know what it is. And I don’t know how people would handle it at school if something happened between us.”

Beth’s eyes sparkled with a glimmer of hope. ‘He might actually like me. Wow. I have to at least try.’

Beth moved closer to Rick. She stood just a few inches away from him. She’d never been this close to him before in her life. From this distance she could smell that he smelled like the earthy shower gel he probably washed with after practice. He smelled solid. Beth placed her hands lightly on his chest. He felt solid.

She looked up at him, biting her lip subconsciously before murmuring, “No one would have to know.”

Rick felt himself become aroused at her close proximity. Beth smelled like vanilla and daisies. So pure and sweet. A contrast to the look she was currently giving him.

Rick leaned down and Beth leaned up. Their lips pressed together tentatively. Both of them marveled at how right it felt. Like finally finding the missing puzzle piece. Rick’s hands grasped her face deepening the kiss. Surprised at the passion that was filling up within himself for her.

He felt Beth’s hands softly grasping his shirt and groaned at the feeling.

Suddenly they both heard some rusting in the background. Rick’s mom was coming down the stairs.

They both pulled away. Rick was flushed with both desire and embarrassment. Beth just began to giggle lightly.

Rick couldn’t help but feel a smile tug on his lips at her adorable laugh, “Why are you laughing? You’re acting like you’ve never been kissed before.”

She smiled back, “I haven’t.”

Rick’s smile widened as does Beth’s as they both stare at each other in wonder.

“Bye Beth!” Mrs. Tyler shouted not knowing exactly where she was in the house, “Rick I’m in the car!”

When Rick looked back at Beth he was suddenly more serious, “Hey but for real can we not talk about this at school?”

Beth rolled her eyes slightly hurt but she understood, “Yeah don’t worry. It’s not like anyone talks to me anyway.”

With that Rick headed off to his car.

* * *

That night Rick went to a party hosted by Jessie feeling happier than he has been in a while. Beth spent the night lying in bed reading and smiling to herself.

* * *

The next day at school she was careful to not interact with Rick. But she did make an effort to eavesdrop on his and his friend’s conversation before class started.

“That party last night was epic Jess.” Henry praised.

“I think Rick had too much fun though.” Cindy giggled.

“Yeah bro that was like the most loose we’ve ever seen you” Cam agreed.

“Yesterday was just a good day that’s all. Bled into the night.” Rick chuckled lightly.

Beth felt herself blush, wondering if he was talking about her. But she was too nervous to look at him so she kept acting as if she was reading.

Her happy bubble was burst when she heard Jessie giggle suggestively, “Well I bet he would’ve had an even better night is he stayed sober long enough to see what I had planned for him. “

Beth tightened up and reached to put her airpods in, no longer wanting to hear what they had to say.

* * *

Rick drove down the road heading home after practice trying to fight the urge to head to Beth’s house.

His mom wasn’t working there today but he wanted to see Beth. To talk to her. Somehow, he felt like he was beginning to miss her.

Before he could stop himself, Rick took the turn that headed to Beth’s house.

10 minutes later he was at her door ringing the doorbell. He was wearing Nike joggers, a sports jacket and the gold chain that he never took off from around his neck.

Beth opened the door surprised to see him. She was wearing a pink tank top and Nike shorts. She looked like she had been doing yoga or something. In the simple outfit she still looked amazingly beautiful.

“Hey Rick! Um your mom isn’t here?”

Rick nodded his voice rough with desire, “I know.”

Beth’s eyes widened in an excited anticipation as she moved to let him in and locked the door behind him.

She walked to her room and Rick followed behind her. Close enough that she could smell his earthy scent.

When she got to her room she moved to stand by the window.

Rick still stood at the door a bit mesmerized by how she glowed in the spring sun.

“Rick are you going to kiss me?” Beth whispered softly.

Needing no further approval Rick crossed the room and pulled Beth to him.

He heard Beth moan and felt her tremble with want underneath his hands as he brought her lips to his roughly. He continued kissing her desperately. Surprised as to how much he wanted her. It was like his mind wouldn’t let him accept it but now that he was with her it flooded within him.

Rick moved to kiss her neck as Beth sweetly moaned in his ear.

She pulled back to look at him, “Do you want to go further?”

‘Yes yes yes’

Rick pushed aside his thoughts, “Uh not here.”

Beth nodded her head but looked disappointed.

“No one’s gonna be at my house on Saturday. If you want to come over.” Rick murmured softly cradling her face in his hands.

Beth’s eyes sparkled and she nodded before bringing her lips back to Rick’s. She felt herself melt in his arms. Loving how it felt when his hands found their way to her waist. It was almost too much and Rick found himself subconsciously rubbing his hand up underneath Beth’s shirt so he could feel more of her soft skin.

Beth was surprised to feel that Rick had moved them, his hands still rubbing her lower back underneath her shirt, so that her legs hit the edge of her bed. She moaned in his mouth at the contact and Rick pulled away.

His eyes were hot with desire as he stared at Beth’s eyes and swollen lips.

“Mm I tempted you didn’t I?” Beth whispered suggestively, giggling.

‘Bet you’ve never felt like this because of Jessie.’

“You did.” Rick groaned aroused, “But I have to go. Gotta take my mom grocery shopping.”

Beth nodded. She sat on the edge of the bed as he moved to leave.

Before he headed out her door Rick looked at her, “You’re coming Saturday right?”

Beth nodded smiling, “Yup I’ll be there.”

Rick gave her a light smile. She could still see the want dancing in his eyes before he turned around and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :) Please let me know what you think ! Also if your wondering where Courtney and Yolanda are they will not be from Blue Valley and instead will join this fic when our pair heads to college!


	2. The Ghost House

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you can't tell my sleep schedule is now completely out of whack haha. In this chapter Rick and Beth fall more in love. Something I want to note is that though Rick does really care about Beth, what he's doing to her (in terms of keeping her a secret) is wrong. I do not think that aspect of their relationship is cute or sexy. But you will see this addressed and rectified in future chapters. With that, happy reading!

_Saturday_

Beth danced around in her room to Lizzo’s “Juice” as she tried on different outfits for her date with Rick.

She had already applied a light amount of eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss. The night before Beth had flexi-rodded her hair and now that she had pulled the rods out, her hair had beautiful tight curls throughout that she carefully teased apart.

After trying on multiple outfits, she opted for her cute casual soft yellow skater dress. It was super comfortable, and she felt amazingly confident in it.

Beth slipped on some white converse, grabbed her small sling purse and began the 30-minute walk to Rick’s house.

* * *

When Rick heard his doorbell ring he immediately startled up and checked himself in the mirror, straightening his gray shirt and running his hand through his hair.

Rick quickly walked down his home’s hall to answer the door and was greeted by Beth’s beautiful presence.

“Hey Rick!” Beth smiled still standing in the door.

Rick barely could find words he was so amazed at how gorgeous Beth looked. He awkwardly moved to let her in, “Uh hey Beth.”

Seemingly oblivious to Rick’s flustered state, Beth looked around his house, her eyes lingering on his family portrait.

Rick closed the door and turned to face her.

“Um do you want something to drink?”

Rick groaned at himself internally, ‘Really is that the best you can come up with?’

Beth turned to look at him smiling happily, “Oh yes! Do you have sweet tea?”

Rick nodded and led Beth to his family kitchen.

Beth sat at the kitchen table. Her bright radiance exuding energy throughout the room.

Rick walked to the fridge and pulled out the tea. Then he turned to pull out two glasses from the cabinet behind him.

He turned to ask Beth if she wanted ice and saw what she didn’t want him to see. Her hands were gripping themselves so tightly that he could see her skin becoming paler due to the pressure.  
‘She’s nervous’

Rick, surprised by this revelation, placed the two glasses on his kitchen counter and filled one with ice and the other without. He poured the tea in both and brought the glasses over.

“Would you like the one with ice or the one with no ice?”

“Uh doesn’t matter to me. I’ll just take the one you like least.” Beth capitualted cheerfully.

Rick smirked to himself knowingly, ‘Beth Chapel the smart, beautiful, confident and kind girl that for some reason is giving me the time of day is sitting here nervous because of me? The world really is a strange place.’

Rick looked at her pointedly feeling more confident knowing how nervous they both were, “I want you to have the one that you want.” His eyes bore into hers as he spoke, “You just gotta tell me what you want... I’ll give it to you.”

Beth nodded, the tension in her shoulders melted away, and a real smile graced her face.

‘He’s letting me know I’m still in control here.’

“Okay, I’ll take the one without ice.”

Rick handed it to her, and they sipped their tea together.

They sat in silence for a second before Rick forced himself to tell her what he should’ve said when he first opened the door, “You look really beautiful Beth.”

Beth looked at him surprised and a small smile and deep blush graced her face.

Rick felt his heart warm at the sight. It was a wonderful gift to make Beth Chapel happy.

“Thank you Rick.”

They both finished their tea and Beth looked at Rick, “Well give me the tour. I would love to see where _the_ Rick Tyler grew up.”

Rick chuckled and brought Beth around his house lightly guiding her with a hand on the small of her back.

He showed her his homely living room and the backyard filled with flowers that his mom tended religiously. Then finally he took her to his room.

Rick opened his door and let her inside. She was the first girl he’d ever brought in his room.

Beth marveled at what she saw inside. It was a dark blue room. There were a few posters from 90s rock bands, a soccer team, and most surprisingly a large print out of the periodic table hanging up on his wall.

Beth giggled when she saw it and then moved to plop down on his bed, “So this is why you’re doing so good in Chemistry?”

Rick smirked still standing near the door, “Maybe so” he continued a little more grimly, “It actually belonged to my dad. He had it up in his lab.”

Beth nodded sadly looking at Rick’s somewhat pained expression. With a gentle voice she recalled, ”I remember when your dad came to our 3rd grade class and showed us how to make rocket launchers with film canisters and alka-seltzer.”

Rick’s eyes met hers from across the room overwhelmed by the sudden recalling of a memory he had thought he lost.

Beth smiled softly at the memory, “I remember how a dozen film canisters whizzed through the air. Yours went the highest and he was so proud. That was one of my favorite memories from that year. Your dad was a great man.”

Rick stared at her touched, “Thanks. He was.”

Beth nodded and then after a beat teasingly remarked, “Well you definitely have much cooler posters than I do.”

Rick laughed lightly, amazed at how Beth could easily move him through moods, “That so? I was a bit distracted but if I recall correctly I don’t think you had any in your room.”

Beth giggled, “Precisely.”

Rick rolled his eyes, “Beth you are so-”

“Annoying?” Beth interjected.

Rick scrunched his eyebrows in confusion looking at Beth. She still looked happy despite that negative interjection.

“Uh no that’s not what I was going to say.” Rick started confused.

“It’s fine if you were. People think of me as many things: annoying, loud, bossy, obnoxious. The main one definitely being annoying.”

Rick shook his head in disagreement, “No one thinks that about you. And I mean some people probably think of me as annoying sometimes too.”

“Everyone likes you Rick. You’re kind of shy and mysterious because you keep your opinions to yourself. People like that.”

Rick bristled, “I don’t think of myself as shy. I’m just not as sure of what my opinions are as you Beth.”

Beth nodded but didn’t say anything.

Despite the personal nature of the conversation Rick felt surprisingly comfortable talking like this with Beth and found himself opening up more, “Honestly sometimes I really struggle with knowing what I’m feeling or what I want. Truthfully... I hardly ever know exactly what I want.”

Beth looked shyly up at him through her eyelashes, “Do you know what you want now?”

The words had barley finished coming out of her mouth before Rick had crossed the room and brought her lips to his.

Beth stood up from the bed so Rick wouldn’t have to bend so much and wrapped her arms around his neck.

They kissed passionately for a while and then Rick started to move his face down her neck. Nuzzling it with his nose first before he kissed all along it, searching for the spot that made her grip him tighter.

He found it seconds later and began sucking on it causing Beth to squirm with pleasure in his arms .Rick bit and sucked it leaving an impressive hickey on her neck.

“Rick… mmmm I want more.”

Rick pulled back to look at her cupping her face with one hand.

“Tell me what you want.”

Beth look deeply in his eyes letting herself be vulnerable, “I want you Rick. All of you.”

Rick eyes darkened, overwhelmed at her admission, and he pulled away so that he could pull off his clothes.

Beth quickly kicked her shoes off and pulled her dress over her head.

They both finished undressing except for their underwear.

Rick started at her in the eyes still not looking at her body, “Hey are you sure?”

Beth nodded as she reached behind her to unclasp her white bra, “Completely.”

Beth’s bra pooled at her feet. Still Rick kept his eyes up on her face, “Okay I have a condom. But I need you to know if at any time you want to stop, I will stop. And I’ll check on you throughout too okay?”

Beth curiously looked at Rick, “Have you done this before?”

“Done what?”

“Seduced a woman?”

Rick looked at her surprised, “I’ve had sex before but when I came to your house I just really wanted to talk to you. To be around you”, he smiled teasingly, “If anything you seduced me.”

Beth smiled and giggled wrapping her arms around Rick’s shoulder, “I was trying to. Just didn’t think it would actually work. You know, there are other prettier gir-“

Rick cut off her rambling by kissing her. He was dripping with desire as he pulled her bottom lips between his and sucked. His hands ran up and down her small body. He began kissing every inch of skin his mouth could touch, relishing in the sounds of her moans.

* * *

Beth and Rick laid naked and spent on his bed. Beth’s soft curvy body was halfway on top of him. Her head resting on his chest.

Beth felt amazing. She had shared apart of herself with the beautiful person that she had always admired and liked. Maybe even loved.

She never wanted to be the type of person to find the solution to her problems in another person. But isn’t that exactly how to stop loneliness? And sometimes she felt _so_ lonely, so isolated, even surrounded in a room full of people. But when she was with Rick she felt at peace. His eyes when they he joined together for the first time burrowed into hers and she swears she could see every inch of his soul just as he could see hers. In that moment she saw what Rick tried to hide so desperately, he was lonely too.

Rick rubbed his hand up and down Beth’s back relishing at the feeling of her body against his. Rick has had sex before and it was really because of this that he knew what just happened between them was so much more than just a normal hookup.

It was more than bodies merging, it was souls uniting. Rick was equally awed and fearful of it. Awed because it was perfect. Beth is perfect. Fearful because now he didn’t know how he could ever go another day without her.

Rick softly brushed the baby hairs on the crown of Beth’s forehead and watched her fall asleep on his chest before he drifted off to sleep himself.

* * *

_Monday_

“Bro we heard your mom wasn’t in town Saturday! She went to go visit your uncle in California? Why didn’t you tell us we could’ve thrown a party at yours!” Cam asked at their lunch table.

Rick shrugged, “Oh I didn’t really think about that, I was just studying. “

All his friends stared at him blankly before bursting out laughing.

“Dude what?” Henry asked between laughs.

“Rick Tyler spending his Saturday _studying_? What is this Freaky Friday?” Cindy giggled.

Everyone laughed and Rick chuckled along with them. Just then, Beth passed by their table on her way to sit in her usual isolated spot. All his friends were too busy laughing to notice her, but Rick immediately did. He continued chuckling for effect, but his attention was completely on watching her walk by with her head high. Though she tried to cover it up he could still slightly see the hickey he gave her. The sight of it stirring some deep desire within him.

They continued like this for most of the week. Not acknowledging each other at school but anytime they could get each other alone he was on her and she was on him. Rick’s fear that he couldn’t get enough of her proved to be well founded as he found himself constantly thinking about Beth. Which was only relieved when he was with her.

While they were used to sneaking around, that weekend Rick decided he wanted to take Beth out. He drove them two towns over to a park. Beth, the amazing cook that she is, prepared the food for the picnic while Rick brought the blankets and the supplies.

Beth was laying in Rick’s arms gazing at the blue sky above when she mentioned something that had been eating at her.

“Hey, I’m going to Prom. I know you and your friends will be there. You don’t mind do you?”

Rick looked at her confused, “Of course not.”

Beth looked at him a little longer hoping maybe by some chance he’d take the hint and ask her but he didn’t.

She quickly covered up her wish by jokingly responding, “Well I hope you don’t find it too hard to resist me.”

Rick chuckled squeezing her lightly before grumbling, “I always find it hard to resist you.”

Beth smiled and leaned her head back in his chest. They spent the rest of the time gazing at the clouds as Beth tried to explain to him different facts about the types of clouds that passed over them.

* * *

  
The next time they had sex Beth was still thinking about prom afterwards. She wondered if he was planning on taking someone else. Rick was leaning up over her on one arm playing with her hair when Beth mustered up the courage to ask him the thing she had dreaded knowing.

“Do you have a crush on anyone at school?”

Rick’s eyebrows came together in confusion before he laughed a little. When she didn’t laugh with him he stopped and addressed her seriously, “Beth I literally was just inside you 5 minutes ago.”

Beth maintained eye contact trying to read him, “Yeah but that doesn’t mean you don’t have a crush on someone. Maybe Jessie?”

She searched his eyes for any sign of defensiveness but instead found surprise and confusion.

She continued on pushing harder, “I mean I know she likes you.”

Rick breaks, “I don’t have feelings for her.”

Beth pressed on skeptically, “Was she then one you had sex with first?”

Rick paused but then spoke truthfully, “Yes. But that doesn’t matter. It was one time. She doesn’t matter to me like that I promise.”

Beth could see she had somehow started to distress Rick with her skeptical tone, ‘Pull yourself together Beth.’

She softly leaned up and kissed him, “Okay sorry for going all CSI on you. I was just curious.”

Rick nodded pulling her closer to him and laying back down in the bed.

* * *

  
Hours later, Rick had pulled on some joggers and was sitting at his deck researching colleges while Beth was wearing one of his shirts reading their English required reading in his bed.

Rick frustratedly sighed burying his head in his hands. He’d been trying so hard to figure out what he wanted to study at school but just couldn’t figure it out.

He heard Beth get up from his bed and then felt her arms wrap around him from behind in a warm embrace. She buried her head in his shoulder before turning his chair to face her. Beth sat in his lap and pulled his hands from his face.

Rick wrapped his arms around her and looked at her soft worried face, knowing she was waiting for him to explain in his own time what was wrong.

“I just can’t figure out what I want to study” Rick began frustratedly, “and because of that I don’t know where I should go to school.”

Beth nodded understanding rubbing his hands soothingly as he spoke. Then she smiled softly squeezing his hands, “Rick the answer is all around you. Look at that periodic table on your wall, look at the science fiction books you have on your desk and the nonfiction chemistry books under your bed, the fact that you force me to repeatedly watch reruns of _Cosmos_ and one of your favorite movies is _Wall-E_. You love science Rick and you’re good at it. Better than me as you refuse to let me forget. I’ve watched you light up in science classes for years. That’s what you love. It’s even in your _blood_.”

Hearing Beth say that suddenly put it all into perspective for Rick. He really did love science. He always thought it was just because it made him feel closer to his dad. And even if that was part of the reason, it didn’t matter because he did love science.

Rick smiled and then pecked Beth on the lips, “Has anyone ever told you that you’re a genius?”

Beth giggled, “Mmm maybe once or twice.”

Beth got up from Rick’s lap and went to go lay back in his bed.

“And you’re in luck because I too love science, medicine in particular, and all the places I’ve applied will also be perfect for you. I’ll send you over my list.”

“Ha if we go to the same school you would probably pretend to not know me.”

Beth looked at him surprised, her eyes clouding with hurt, “I would never pretend to not know you Rick.”

“Im sorry. I know that. Just a bad joke.”

Beth nodded understanding and then went back to her book. Rick started at her for a few more seconds wondering what type of person he was to be hiding the increasing love he felt for her from the world.

* * *

The next day Rick, Cam, and Henry were walking towards the locker room after school talking about Prom.

“Yo are you gonna ask Jess? She totally wants you to dude.” Cam questioned Rick.

“Yeah man you better swoop in there before Cam tries to take her.” Henry laughed.

When they turned the corner to head down another hallway, they all saw Beth. She was heading in the direction they were coming from.

Henry called out to her teasingly, “Hey Beth, wanna go to Prom with me?”

Beth rolled her eyes, “You know I’m too good for you Henry.”

Henry’s fists clenched and his anger flared up, “Whatever Beth don’t be a bitch. Thought you’d appreciate it since someone would have to be desperate to take your ugly ass.”

Rick tensed as if someone had splashed cold water on him. Beth slightly glanced at him before holding her head down and walking past all of them.

It took every ounce of his energy to not swing on Henry and go check on Beth, but he forced himself to walk on. Minutes later he realized he gripped his hands so hard in a fist he left deep nail marks.

After practice, Rick sped to Beth’s house, his mom wasn’t working today and he wanted to check on her.

Rick vigorously knocked on her door and then waited for Beth. A minute later the door swung open revealing Beth. She looked a bit tired wearing a yellow hoodie that he immediately recognized as his own.

Rick pulled her into a hug which she did not reciprocate.

As he held her in the doorway he whispered, “I’m sorry Beth. I’m sorry.”

Beth just pulled away from him and walked outside pulling him with her.

Suddenly she asked, “What do you do on the weekends? Where do you all hang out?”

“Uh” Rick began confused as to where she was going with this, “Jessie’s older brother has a connect so sometimes we can get into the bar a town over or a lot of times we hang out at the Ghost House.”

“The Ghost House?”

“Yeah The Ghost House. You haven’t heard of it?”

“No.”

“Oh well it’s this old abandoned house behind the school where kids go to hang out and drink and party on the weekend.”

Beth nodded before demanding, “Take me there.”

Rick looked at her with confusion, surprised with how strongly she demanded it but nodded and led her to his car.

They drove there in silence and when they reached the old dilapidated house Beth got out looking around in wonder. They walked though the house and to the backyard where chairs and a fire pit had been set up by students. Beer cans littered the ground in different states of decomposition, from students come and gone. So many of her classmates from school had been here yet she never knew about it.

Beth folded her arms around herself, suddenly feeling worlds apart from Rick.

“Do you know how much you mean to me Rick?” Beth said to him quietly, upset, “My parents are on the verge of a divorce that should’ve happened years ago. My dad is always getting drunk and my mom buries herself in her work. When I go home I feel alone. When I go to school I almost always feel alone. You are the only person that talks to me kindly. Except even you don’t want to associate with me in front of others. Sometimes I just feel so so isolated and alone Rick. I think you understand the feeling. But when I’m with you that dissipates. I feel happy. I feel like someone finally sees me. I just.. I would do anything to make you happy.”

Beth holds herself pausing to breathe before asking him teary eyed, “Would you feel sad if I said I never wanted to see you again?”

Rick’s heart dropped at the thought.

He realized then he could lose Beth today and Rick _knew_ that was one thing that he truly could not handle. So, for the first time, Rick let the truth out, “It would tear me apart Beth. I would be upset and deeply sad because I like you so much. And I think you like me too.”

Beth’s eyes softened but her arms remained crossed, “Do you also think I’m ugly like Henry?”

Rick shook his head fiercely, “No of course not. And Henry doesn’t even think that.” Rick bitterly admitted, “You’re beautiful and if Henry thought he had the slightest chance with you he’d be talking very differently.”

Rick was speaking truthfully. He knew Henry had always liked Beth. This was something that may have caused Rick to feel a bit jealous if he didn’t know for a fact that those feelings were completely one sided.

Beth’s posture relaxed even more, and her arms fell to her sides.

Rick murmured,  
“If you end things between us Beth... I’d miss you.”

Beth closed the distance between them pressing her lips to Rick’s. Rick held her and kissed her desperately. Trying to let her feel what she did to him. How much he wanted her always.

When they separated Beth buried her head in his chest and Rick squeezed her to him, never wanting to let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! Let me know what you think :) In the next chapter shit hits the fan. There will be a trigger warning at the beginning of the next one so please take care of yourself and be on the look out for that. Much love!


	3. Cracking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: brief mention of past domestic violence  
> tw: sexual harassment at a party
> 
> This chapter you're gonna need your tissues! Both for happy and sad reasons. This is the last chapter of Beth and Rick in high school before the time jump. This chapter is quite a ride but I'll be honest with you there's quite a bit more wilding that will happen in the future. I spent time today outlining exactly how I want the story to go because there are some major parts of the original source material that I do not feel comfortable exploring. I was able to outline exactly what I want to happen from here to the end and now I know this fic will be 9 chapters long! Yup 9 chapters so we're 1/3 of the way through! I can't believe how much I've written for this. I have never written this much before for one story and so quickly too! I finally know what people mean when they say they felt "inspired". 
> 
> Anyway please enjoy chapter 3!

_A couple weeks later_

Beth sat in the back of her Uber fiddling a bit nervously with the end of her emerald green cocktail dress.

She was on her way to the fundraiser for Prom. The fundraising committee had the ingenious idea to rent out the local Blue Valley Pizzeria for the night and make it into a pseudo night club experience for students, a huge draw for small town kids like those in Blue Valley. 50% of all food sales were going to the committee for the prom.

Beth normally went to these sorts of functions but tonight she was feeling nervous because she had decided to dress up a bit sexier than she normally did.

Instead of her normal light makeup she spent an hour putting on foundation, a complementary green smokey eye with mascara and a dark red lipstick. Her emerald green dress was form fitting with spaghetti straps and a low v neck. It came just above her knees. Probably the most dramatic difference we’re the beautiful long goddess box braids with gold string interwoven in some of them that she did herself yesterday. She finished off the look with a gold pendant necklace and black strappy heels. She even wore her emergency contacts so that she could leave her glasses at home. When she looked at the finished product in the mirror Beth’s first thought was, “Wow. I look like the people they cast to play high schoolers on the CW.”

It was safe to say that no one had ever seen her look this damn good.

Beth knew she looked gorgeous. She worked hard to pull off this look. While she wished she could say she did it all for school spirit, the real reason, that she was desperately trying to deny, was that she wanted to impress Rick. Prom was right around the corner and deep down she believed if Rick could just _see_ her as someone people would accept him being with, he would ask her.

When she reached the fundraiser she was right on time. Which meant that no one except the fundraising crew was there.

The prom fundraising crew was comprised of some of the school’s most popular girls including Cindy and Jessie.

It was these girls who were completely shocked when they saw Beth stroll in looking like she just stepped off the cover of Vogue.

“Oh my God Beth! You look stunning” Cindy gushed.

The other girls crowded around shaking their heads and voicing their agreement.

Jessie reached out and touched one of Beth's braids, "Your hair looks nice."

Beth smiled politely but stiffened at the intrusion and stepped back a little bit, away from Jessie's unwanted touch.

Then she turned and thanked all the girls, “Thanks so much you guys! You all look so beautiful as well.”

The girls all went into a different conversation and Beth marveled at how here she could stand and talk to them without it being weird like it would definitely be at school. Beth smiled and laughed with the girls’ at their random stories but forced herself to not interject with her own comments. She was afraid they would realize the dressed up girl standing with them was the same nerdy girl they’ve been avoiding at school for years.

* * *

  
Rick strolled into the Pizzeria about an hour after the start of the party with six seniors from the varsity soccer team.

He noted, impressed, that the girls were able to transform the space into a dark neony vibe that really did look like a club.

Henry led the group around their other peers as they tried to find Cindy and Jessie.

Rick dapped up a few guys he recognized as they passed by people. His eyes searched the crowd and edges of the venue for the one person he really wanted to see.

“Heyyyyy wow Jess look at that dress!” Henry exclaimed dramatically.

Rick was about to turn to greet his friend when he saw _her_. She was standing nearby but she hadn’t yet noticed him as she was listening to something that Cindy was saying to her.

Rick felt his heart skip a beat and his stomach flip over. His breath left his body as he took in Beth.

To say she looked gorgeous would be an understatement. Rick was usually cautious about how long he stared at her in front of his friends but he couldn’t help it.

The only real coherent thought he could form was ‘ _My god_.’

Suddenly Jessie was in front of him intercepting his line of sight.

“Hey Rick!” she greeted pulling him into a hug.

“Uh hey Jess.” Rick responded distractedly now that he could see Beth again over her shoulder.

This time when he looked at Beth she was looking back at him. They stared at each other and Beth gave him a shy smile.

“Oh my God!” Cam exclaimed nearby, “Beth you look fantastic!”

Rick pulled away from Jessie and tried to watch discretely as Cam approached Beth and gently took her hand, having her do a little spin around for him.

Rick stiffened trying to push down feelings of possessiveness as he watched all his friends thirst over her.

“Wow Beth. Great dress. Very Sexy.” Henry added sounding just a little bitter.

Beth smiled graciously, dazzling everyone, “Thanks guys.”

Rick stayed next to Jessie despite wanting with every fiber of his being to go talk to Beth. Touch her. Have her smile at him. Have the _guys_ back off her.

He tried to focus on what Jessie was saying to him but kept glancing over at Beth.

He watched Cindy grab Beth and lead her to the dance floor.

The two girls danced with each other as if they’d been friends for years. Rick couldn’t help but watch, mesmerized, as Beth’s swayed to the club music.

* * *

Beth had never had any girlfriends and if this was anything close to what it’s like she was so sad to have missed out on it. Dancing with Cindy was so much fun.

Beth turned to glance again at Rick who she was happy to see was still watching her. He looked really good. His hair was slightly tousled and he wore black slacks and a fitted light blue buttoned down shirt. Beth could just barely see the thin gold chain he never took off peaking through the unbuttoned top of his shirt. 

“He has not taken his eyes off of you all night!” Cindy interrupted her thoughts encouraging her.

Beth blushed at them having been caught and tried to deny it, “No I don’t think so.” she giggled coyley.

The girls continued dancing and Beth, having been hyped up by Cindy, started dancing a little more seductively. Grinding a little bit on Cindy and twirling her hips. All while pointedly looking at Rick multiple times.

She hopped maybe he would actually come down to the dance floor. But instead he stayed with the soccer guys and other girls.

Eventually Beth and Cindy decided to take a break and came back to join Cindy’s group.

“Finally back to grace us with your presence?” Jess commented a touch snidely.

Beth just lightly laughed while Cindy reached over and flicked her friend playfully.

Rick was on the other side of the table conversing with Cam. Beth was trying not to look at him too much when suddenly someone was pressed up behind her.

A heavy breath that smelled thick with alcohol rasped next to her ear as she felt a foreign hand rest itself on her waist.

“Hey sexy do you wanna dance?”

Beth pulled away quickly and turned towards the person touching her.

She was surprised to see Cole, one of the varsity football players that sometimes hung out with Rick’s friends, “I don’t want to Cole.”

He smiled grossly and reached out grabbing her arm roughly , “Hey don’t be like that-“

Beth struggled and pushed him away harder, “Don’t touch me!”

The whole group became silent as Beth took off out the side door of the Pizzeria in tears.

Overwhelmed, she crouched down against the wall trying to calm down and wipe away her tears.

She heard the door of the Pizzeria open and the sounds of multiple foot steps. Rick, Cam, Henry, Jessie and Cindy came busting out the door.

Cindy came to her side, crouching next to her worriedly, “Hey are you okay?”

Beth looked up at her nodding weakly.

The others stood nearby in front of them.

“Hey uh Cole’s usually not like that.” Henry offered lamely.

Jessie sneered, “He was just drunk Beth. He didn’t mean any harm. He probably was just trying to be funny.”

Cam gave Jess a side eye as Cindy balked, “Funny? If you think it’s so funny why don’t you go dance around with his stupid ass?”

Jess rebutted, “We were all laughing a minute ago-“

Suddenly Rick’s strong voice filled the air, “No we weren’t.”

Everyone stared at him surprised to hear him speak up.

Beth looked up at him timidly and saw that his eyes were piercing into hers. She could see every inch of his irises were filled with worry.

“You okay?” Rick asked her softly.

Jess interjected jealously, “Oh so you want to kiss her better now?”

Rick sharply responded, “Jess would you ever just shut the hell up?”

Jessie stared at him shocked before walking back to to Pizzeria tears stinging her eyes at Rick’s harsh words. Cam took after her but Rick didn't care. 

His attention was still fully on Beth.

“Do you want to go home?” He asked Beth.

Beth nodded her head.

Rick continued calmly, “I drove here so I can give you a ride if you want.”

Beth nodded again whispering, “Okay.”

Rick approached her as she pushed herself off the ground.

Cindy stood up with her as well picking Beth’s stuff off the ground with her, “These are her things.”

“I’ll take them” Rick offered taking Beth’s stuff from Cindy’s hands.

Beth turned to Cindy and whispered to her teary eyed, “Thank you for being so kind.”

Cindy nodded giving Beth a warm smile.

* * *

The car ride to Beth’s house was mainly silent.

Beth stared out the window while Rick turned to look at her every few seconds.

Rick broke the silence his voice laced with concern, “Beth are you okay?”

Beth struggled to put a smile on her face and turned to nod at him. But her facade broke down when she saw the worry in his eyes, “I just feel so stupid”, she whispered, feeling tears build up in her eyes again.

Rick fiercely shook his head, “No. He was going to hurt you Beth” Rick growled his eyes dark thinking about how he wanted to rip Cole’s arm off and beat him with it.

Then he softened his voice, “You did nothing wrong.”

Beth looked down at her hands willing herself to believe Rick.

“Do you want to come back to mine?” Rick suggested knowing she may not want to go home, “Only if you want to.”

Beth looked at him hopefully, “But won’t your mom be there...”

“Yeah but she won’t mind. She’s cool.”

A small smile graced Beth face, “Yes. I want to go to your place.”

Rick smiled back at her happy to see her spirits somewhat lifting.

Beth continued to stare at him and then reached her hand out to him. Rick moved one of his hands off the wheel to hold hers. Softly bringing her hand up to his lips kissing it before laying their intertwined hands in his lap.

“Your mom must be so proud of the man you’ve grown into.”

Rick glanced at her confused.

“You’re a nice person. You don’t know how rare that truly is.”

* * *

Beth was laid out on Rick’s chest with a fresh washed face and wearing one of his shirts. The rhythmic beat of his heart was calming as Beth played with his fingers.

Rick’s arm was wrapped around Beth rubbing her side soothingly.

“Jessie seemed very upset.” Beth recalled.

Rick grunted unsympathetically, “Yeah.”

“I think she really like you.”

“Doesn’t matter to me.”

“No?”

“No. She’s just a friend.”

“Like I’m just a friend?”

“Stop that. With you there’s obviously real feelings involved.”

Beth sighed, “Obvious to who?”

Beth stopped playing with his fingers and they both fell into a silence.

After a minute Beth whispered to Rick, “Would you ever hit a woman?”

Rick stiffened, totally taken aback.

“What? No Beth. Never.”

When Beth didn't respond Rick pressed on, “Why’d you ask that?”

Rick felt the tears on his chest before he saw them.

Rick moved so he could see Beth’s face.

He cupped her face in his hand searching her eyes worriedly, “Beth what’s going on? What’s wrong?”

She started to shake as sobs racked through her small body, “my dad” she whimpered between sobs, ”one time when he was drunk he hit my mom.”

Rick held her to him as she cried. It hurt him so much to see her like this.

He worriedly and carefully asked her, “I’m so sorry. Has... has he ever hit you?”

Beth looked up at him and shook her head no before crying again sadly burying her head back in his chest.

Rick soothingly stroked Beth’s back until finally he felt her cries slow down. It made him feel sick seeing Beth sad like this and thinking about the trauma that she had buried so deep inside her mind.

When he felt Beth‘s breath begin to regulate he moved back to cup her face in his hand again.

Beth’s soft brown eyes buried into his own. Rick softly wiped off the remaining tears and suddenly felt overwhelmed with how much he cared about her.

Staring in Beth’s eyes everything was clear to him and the feelings that rattled his heart flowed from his mouth naturally, “I would never hurt you Beth. Never. You make me so happy. The happiest I can remember being in years.”

Beth’s lip wobbled a little as she searched Rick’s eyes.

“I love you.”

Her breath caught in her throat and Beth's eyes slightly widened in amazed hope and disbelief.

Rick nodded as he softly traced her face with one finger, “I do. With _everything_ I have I love you.”

Beth teared up again and buried herself in Rick’s arms. Rick held her tightly in his arms and held her until they both fell asleep from exhaustion.

* * *

Beth laid awake in Rick’s bed. The sun was just beginning to rise. He was cuddled up behind her. One arm was wrapped around her and the other was outstretched above her head. Beth stroked the arm that was around her in deep thought about the night before.

‘He loves me. Thank God, he loves me.’

* * *

_10am_

”Alright fine but you text me as soon as you get home” Rick conceded to Beth after she told him again that she didn’t need a ride home.

They were standing inside by his front door with Beth’s arms wrapped around Rick’s neck. Rick ran his hands up and down Beth’s back, not wanting to let her go.

“Of course”, she promised before going up on her tip toes to kiss him.

Her hands were running through his hair causing Rick to deepen the kiss when his front door swung open forcing them to quickly separate from each other.

Mrs. Tyler stood in the doorway with a handful of groceries from morning shopping and looked between the two curiously.

“Oh hi Beth!” she greeted, a knowing smile on her lips.

“Good Morning Mrs. Tyler!” Beth stammered embarrassed, “Um I was just on my way out. I’ll see you later!”

Beth sped out the front door tossing one look back to Rick before continuing on down the road.

Rick watched her walking away wearing his shirt and a pair of shorts and shoes that she had left in his room from another night.

"Hm MM", His mom cleared her throat, drawing his attention back to her.

Rick looked at his mom sheepishly, opening his mouth to explain.

Before he could begin his mom laughed joyfully.

Mrs. Tyler did not laugh very often so the sound made Rick immediately smile in response.

He scratched his head blushing a little and then took the groceries from his mom to help her put them up.

“So you’re not mad?” Rick questioned as he placed some cans in the kitchen cabinet.

“No. Ive known someone has been coming here in the afternoons, and then I noticed how you both have acted around each other lately at her house. So it didn’t take long for me to connect the dots. I just don’t know why you two are so sneaky about it.”

Rick scratched his head, “Uh well we’re kinda not telling anyone. Like at all.”

Rick mom looked at him confused, “Why? She doesn’t have a boyfriend or someone else does she?”

“No mom.” Rick began and then looked away as he lied “We just don’t want people to know because it would be an annoyance for the both of us at school.”

Rick’s mom stared at him skeptically but decided to let it go, “Well I don’t understand why you want to keep it a secret. You two seem really good for each other. But you don’t have to worry about me telling anyone, no way would I want to gossip about my son’s sex life.” she laughed lightly before continuing, “And I know I don’t have to tell you to be safe and use protection. But be safe and use protection.”

Rick laughed lightly with his mom. Happy to see her up early this morning and genuinely happy.

* * *

_Monday_

“So Rick... how was your night with Beth?” Cam wiggled his eyebrows at his friend in the boys locker room.

Henry laughed and joined in, “Yeah Rick. Exactly what type of _ride_ did you give her?”

Rick ignored them and continued changing. He tried to push down the rising feeling of anxiety that his friend’s prying was causing him.

“Ahhh come on man. Tell us... just _how much_ did you cheer her up?” Cam laughed.

Henry joined in with Cam's laughing and soon the other guys in the locker room started chucking too.

Rick felt a terrible wave of anxiety slam over him. He quickly pulled on his last shoe and slammed his locker shut quickly leaving the locker room.

“Rick! Don’t hold out on us bro!” He heard Henry call out to him teasingly.

Rick rushed down the hall until he reached the boys bathroom. It was empty and Rick crouched down on the ground burying his head in his hands trying to stop the impending panic attack he felt coming. 

‘God this is awful. Come on calm down Rick. It’s fine. There’s no way they know. Breathe. Just breathe. Maybe if they knew they wouldn’t care that much? No _of course_ they would and they would abandon me. They’d never talk to me again. I’d lose all of them.’

This fear of abandonment had been a part of Rick ever since his father left one day and never came back. Rick knew that his dad would’ve come back had he survived the drive home but the loneliness that permeated throughout his life ever since was real nonetheless.

Rick was desperate to make sure he didn’t lose anyone else. It was this feeling of desperation that caused him to get up and walk quickly to the outside field. The cheerleading team was just wrapping up their practice so Rick walked right up to Jessie.

“Hey Jess” Rick began.

Jessie looked at him skeptically nervously tugging at the bottom of her cheerleading skirt, “Hey Rick.”

“Uh listen I’m sorry for snapping at you the other day.”

Jess crossed her arms around herself, “Yeah you really went postal... seems like Beth really likes you or something?”

Rick looked away and shook his head, “Uh no it’s not like that.”

Jess’s hands dropped to her sides as she stared at him expectantly.

“Do you want to go to Prom with me?” Rick blurted out.

Jess smiled and nervously brushed the hair out of her face, “Yes I would love to.”

Rick nodded and forced a smile on his face.

They walked together to the front of the school where his other friends were standing around talking.

Jess immediately shared the news, to the excitement of everyone around them.

And then _finally_ Rick felt like he could breathe again.

* * *

When Beth heard the knock on her door she got up in excited anticipation.

She smoothed her shirt before jogging down the stairs to go open the door.

She pulled the door open and threw herself into Rick’s arms. He held her tightly squeezing her to him before setting her back down.

Beth giggled and held his hand pulling him inside, “Your mom is cleaning the master bedroom right now. She might need like 20 more minutes.”

They both sat down at her kitchen table.

“Uh I have to tell you something about Prom.” Rick began.

Beth straightened up and stared at him expectantly, ‘He’s finally going to ask me!’

“I asked Jessie and she said yes.”

With that one simple sentence Beth’s heart plummeted.

Rick continued, seeing the undeniable hurt that clouded her eyes, “Beth I promise Jess and I are just friends. We’re going as friends.”

Beth’s eyes hardened as she responded bitterly, “Yeah like we’re just friends .”

Rick somewhat joked, “No not like us at all. Plus why would I need to sleep with Jess when I already have you?”

Rick was trying to make a joke to lighten the situation but instead he doused a fire with gasoline.

“Get out.”

“Beth...”

“No Rick. Get the hell out!”

Rick stared at her for a second, he’d never seen her this angry like this before. Then he got up and walked out of her door to go sit in his car and wait for his mom.

Once Rick was out of her house , Beth ran up the stairs burying her face in her pillow to quiet down the sounds of her cries.

‘Im never going to be enough for him.’

* * *

“How was your day?” Mrs. Tyler asked Rick kindly from the passenger seat as they drove home.

“Uh. It was good.” Rick nodded, “Actually I asked Jess to prom.”

“Jess?!” Rick’s mom balked, “What did Beth not want to go?”

“No she does.” Rick mumbled.

“Is she going with someone else?”

“No.”

“So you DIDNT think you should have asked her given that you fuck her every day after school?”

Rick sat unmoving keeping his eyes in the road, he knew his mom was pissed, she only ever cursed when she was really angry.

“So let me get this straight”, Mrs. Tyler continued, “ _You_ and Beth have sex in secret. _You_ go to school and act like you don’t know her. _You_ won’t let her talk to other people about your relationship.”

Rick continued to say nothing confirming his moms suspicions.

“Are you even nice to her at school?”

Rick said nothing.

“ _Why_ Rick? Why would you do that? Do you really care that much about what other people think of you?”

When he still said nothing Mrs. Tyler let in on him, “Well here’s what I think of you right now. Im disgusted by your actions and I am ashamed of you.”

Rick continued to look ahead and said nothing.

* * *

For the whole week Beth ignored all of Rick’s messages. At school she never looked at him. She was determined to just make it through the school year and graduate. She wanted to go far away and start over.

Not speaking to Rick tore her apart but she couldn’t let him treat her like this any longer. She wouldn’t let someone who said they loved her treat her like this. Though Beth did not want anything to do with Rick right now, she surprisingly wasn’t mad at him anymore. She’d just had enough of the lies and secrets. She felt that the only person who was winning in their last arrangement was Rick.

Beth walked into her kitchen to get a glass of water and greeted Mrs. Tyler who was there sweeping the floors.

“Oh hey Mrs. Tyler!”

“Hey darling!” Mrs. Tyler smiled at her, “How are you?”

“Im okay.” Beth said softly, looking away.

Mrs. Tyler nodded sympathetically, “Rick told me you’ve been ignoring his messages.”

Beth looked down nervously trying to come up with a response.

“Good for you.”

Beth snapped her head back up meeting Mrs. Tyler’s truthful gaze.

“He doesn’t deserve you.”

Beth blinked surprised to hear Mrs. Tyler talk about Rick that way. And found herself feeling obligated to defend him, “Well compared to most people he’s been amazingly nice to me.”

Mrs. Tyler’s eyes crinkled sadly and she pulled Beth into a hug.

“My son is a good boy but he’s been able to get away with a lot while doing the bare minimum for you. This town doesn’t define you Beth. You are such a wonderful person and there will be more and more people that will see that as you grow older. And soon my son will realize what a treasure he had. I hope for his sake that he can find a way to win you back. But don’t make it easy on him sweetie. My Rex had to fight for years to get my attention and we were all the better because of it.”

* * *

_That night_

“How’s Beth?” Rick asked his mom from across the dinner table.

Mrs. Tyler looked at him sternly, “She’s doing alright. She’s just very hurt Rick.”

Rick stared off, trying to push away the increasing guilt and sadness he felt. These last few days had been terrible for him as he dealt with feelings of guilt, loneliness, and the awful relentless ache of missing Beth.

“Mom”, Rick began taking a shaky breath before continuing, “Im feeling really bad and I need you to be on my side here.”

Mrs. Tyler looked at him sadly, “You’re my son. My baby. And I love you so so much. But I’m not on your side with this one. What you did was wrong Rick. What you did to Beth was _wrong_. And I don’t think it’s a bad thing that you feel a bit bad about it.”

Rick, still refusing to fully accept what his mom was saying and own up to what he’d done, pushed up and out of the table seat and went into his room closing the door behind him.

* * *

_A month later_

As Rick straightened his tie for the dance all he wanted to do was rip the thing off and bury himself in his bed.

He felt miserable and had no desire to go to Prom but his mom wouldn’t let him ditch.

“You asked Jess. So you show up for her and try to have fun with your friends. This is one of your last hoorahs before college!”

Rick gave his mom a weak smile as she smoothed his hair and suit and handed him the corsage for Jess.

“Okay you look so handsome! Let me snap a picture before you go!”

* * *

At the dance Rick tried his hardest to act engaged and like he was having fun.

His mind however was in only one place. Beth.

He spent the whole night looking around hoping she’d show up but now there was just one hour left and he realized she was not coming.

The realization that his sweet, kind Beth wasn’t attending the Prom she had been so excited about burned his soul. To say he felt like shit would be an understatement.

Rick walked out onto the balcony of the venue to take some deep breaths. Soon after, Henry showed up next to him passing him a canister.

Rick took a long swig.

“So she didn’t show up.” Henry remarked plainly.

Rick pretended, half-heartedly, to not know who he was talking, “Hm?”

Henry scoffed, “Oh come on man. You think we don’t all know you and Beth have been sneaking around?”

Now Henry really had Rick’s attention, “What?”

“Yeah dude we’re not as dense as you two smarties want to believe.”

Rick started at Henry dumbfounded before handing him the canister and walking out of Prom.

His mind was reeling, ‘This whole time.... this whole time they’ve known. They didn’t even care. We could’ve been together this whole time. I broke Beth’s heart and my own for nothing. God I fucking broke Beth’s heart for _nothing_.’

As Rick walked out of prom his cool guy facade was cracking for the first time ever in public. Tears burned in his eyes as he passed his classmates. When he reached the exit he continued to walk down the street and pulled out his phone to call Beth, wiping hot tears away.

The phone rang and rang before going to voicemail.

“Hi this is Beth!” Rick’s heart clenched at the sweet sound of her voice, “So sorry I can’t get to the phone right now but leave a message! I’ll get back to you ASAP!”

The loud beep sounded and Rick breathed heavily into the phone.

He tried to push back tears and stay composed but failed as soon as he opened his mouth, “It’s me. I’m just calling to say that I um,” he stumbled over his words tearfully, “that I miss you. Um... I can’t really talk to anybody the way I talk to you” Rick breathed shallowly fighting hard to push back tears though a few still slipped out, “I just miss you so much and all I can say is that I really love you Beth and” tears were now fully dripping down Rick’s face clouding his eyes, “um yeah I’m sorry.”

He hung up and took deep breaths trying unsuccessfully to stop the flow of tears. Rick pressed his hands to his eyes and continued walking down the street into the cool night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I know I'm the worst :'( 
> 
> But just hold on! There will soon be more.
> 
> Let me know what you think so far! I love hearing y'alls thoughts :)


	4. Reset

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> our favs are now in college and things are majorly different now! I hope you enjoy it!

_4 months later_

  
The elevator dinged and it’s doors spread open. Rick stepped out with the last of his few bags for college.

He walked down the dorm hallway till he reached his room, 1941, and swiped his key card to let himself in. He plopped his bags by his side of the double and began unpacking his things.

Rick’s roommate Joey, the housing assignment sheet said, had clearly already moved in but was not in the room when Rick arrived on campus.

When Rick was almost done unpacking he stood to look at his side versus Joey’s. His side of the room was sparse in comparison. Everything he brought to college fit into 2 suitcases and one backpack. Exactly what he could bring for free on a Southwest flight.

Joey’s walls were covered with posters of what Rick could only assume were some sort of modern day magicians. His bed was lofted up and underneath were an array of small dorm room appliances and extra drawers. On his desk there was a large desktop computer with a gaming system attached.

Rick noted these differences unsurprised. He knew that very few students at Northwestern were able to get a full tuition scholarship like he did. The rest were somehow able to afford the $70k+ a year.

Rick knelt down and reached in his suitcase, pulling out the last item that he had wrapped up carefully.

He unrolled it and pinned it to the wall above his bed. His father’s periodic table.

Seeing it up on the wall Rick felt a little bit more at home.

‘This is for you dad.’

* * *

The first month of college was one of the loneliest periods of Rick’s life. This was a complete oxymoron given that he’s never been surrounded by more people in his life.

Being 10 hours away from home in a big city at a college filled with thousands of perfect strangers was hard for Rick to adjust to. Even worse, Rick felt that somehow he didn’t really belong here.

‘How could I belong among students whose parents are senators and CEOs? Maybe they didn’t even actually mean to admit me.’

In class he listened diligently but felt too nervous to participate. He spent his days going to class, studying, and eating. Always alone.

Rick realized he didn’t really know how to make friends. Joey would sometimes try to invite him to hang out with his friends but Rick always made up excuses that he wanted to study. It was true that he did want to study, but he knew that if he wanted to he could make time to hang out with Joey and his friends.

The real reason Rick didn’t go was that he was scared. Scared they wouldn’t like him and would realize he was nothing like them.

So for the first month of college being alone was how Rick existed. He was prepared to spend the entirety of college like this until he FaceTimed Cam, who was abroad at an Art School in France.

“Rick this college shit is amazing man. It’s once in a lifetime stuff. They’re paying you to be there dude. No one pays for someone they don’t want. Just try to put yourself out there once. Just try. See what happens.”

It was this message that was rattling around in Rick’s head the first time he said yes to Joey asking him if he wanted to go hang out with some of his friends.

Joey smiled happily and brought Rick along to the magicians club. It was totally not Rick’s thing but the people were nice. And they were talented. More than that, they accepted him.

It was then that Rick started to realize that most of his fears were just in his head.

The next day in his Chemistry subsection there was one particularly hard problem that seemed to stump everyone in the class. Rick knew the answer, as always, but this time he rose his hand to say it.

His TA, Malachi, was throughly impressed by Rick’s ability to not only answer the question correctly but then explain exactly how he reached that answer.

At the end of class when Rick was packing up to head to the cafeteria, Malachi approached him.

“Hey man. You’re Rick right?”

Rick nodded.

“You’ve had the best scores in class since the first week and today you did really good with actually participating. I’m the president of the science debate club. We debate different scientific topics like tonight we’re talking about Global Warming. Would you be interested in joining? “

Rick responded nodding, “Yeah man that sounds cool.”

It seemed like a good opportunity for him to try to meet more people and branch out a bit.

“Great! Our second meeting of the semester is tonight at 7. See you there?”

“Yeah for sure.”

* * *

  
_7:14pm_

Rick watched in disbelief as Malachi debated with another member of the club that Global Warming was not real.

Rick stared between Malachi and the girl debating him intrigued at the way they could speak so quickly and confidently. Especially Malachi, since a lot of the ‘facts’ that he was spewing were not even true.

When it was his turn to contribute to the topic, Rick felt surprisingly confident. He realized that he might actually be the only one in the room who cared enough to do extensive research on the topic before the club meeting.

Rick spoke firmly, “ _The planet's average surface temperature has risen about 1.62 degrees Fahrenheit since the end 19th century. 95% of this change is driven largely by increased carbon dioxide and other human-made emissions into the atmosphere. Most of the warming occurred in the past 35 years, with the six warmest years on record taking place since 2014. Global warming has caused irreparable damage to the earth already._ As we sit here debating this and listening to people deny the rising sea levels, melting glaciers, dying wildlife we sit here and accept our impending doom.”

Everyone in the club stared at him impressed. Rick felt flustered from the attention and looked back down in his notes.

After the meeting Malachi approached him again.

“Hey man thanks for coming! You did really good.”

“Thanks for inviting me.” Rick offered with a friendly smile.

“Actually I’m having a party at my place this weekend if you wanna come?”

Rick had not yet been to a party since he got to school and felt flustered by the prospect, “Uh yeah dude I’ll think about it.”

“Great. Lemme give you the address.”

* * *

  
_The next day_

“Yes you should definitely go to the party Rick!” Mrs. Tyler exclaimed excitedly over the phone.

“Uhh mom. He’s going to be the only person there I know. I don’t want it to be awkward.”

“Rick sometimes change is a little bit awkward. Embrace the feeling. And yeah he might be the only person you know there at first, but just go hang out with him for a minute and let him introduce you to some people and let it roll from there!”

“I guess..”

“Rick you’re a great kid. People will be happy to meet you. You just have to actually let them.”

* * *

On Saturday night, Rick entered the loud and crowded apartment feeling totally out of his element.

Music was blasting all around the clearly expensive place and Rick felt overwhelmed by all the strangers.

Rick stuffed his hands in his jean pockets and forced himself to push on and look for Malachi. Finally, he found him in the kitchen mixing drinks.

“HEYYY RICK!” Malachi exclaimed clearly a bit drunk.

Rick nodded and offered a small smile, “Hey man.”

“What’s uppp welcome to my party! Lemme introduce you to some of my folks.”

Malachi led him to a group of fratty looking students.

“Hey guys this is Rick. He’s a freshman but he’s wicked smart, could pass for a sophomore like us.”

The group all greeted him nicely.

One of the girls asked, “Where ya from Rick?”

Rick cleared his throat, “Oh uh Im from Nebraska.”

The whole group oooed and looked at him like he was a cool animal at the zoo.

“Nebraska! OMG! Most of us here are pretty much from the suburbs of Chicago. I could tell you weren’t from here but Nebraska! Wow what’s it like there?“ one guy asked.

Rick shrugged and scratched his head, “Uh it’s quiet.”

Suddenly Malachi interjected chuckling, “Wait that’s so cool dude my girlfriend is from Nebraska too! She said the same thing.”

Rick nodded and before he could respond someone else was asking him another question, “So where do you live on campus?”

“Oh I live over in Pittman.”

“Oh man not Pittman! That sucks dude! Those rooms are all small and they’re all doubles.”

Everyone groaned and Rick stared at them wondering how his experience could be so different from their own. Rick’s room was one of his favorite spaces on campus. It was basically the only place on campus that he felt safe.

Malachi interjected, “Hey man lemme introduce you to some more people.”

Rick followed Malachi out onto his large balcony.

At the end of the balcony there was a group of people standing in a circle talking.

Malachi approached that group and then called out, “ Hey Beth! Come here babe.”

Suddenly the circle opened up and _she_ stepped out from the other side of it.

Rick’s heart slammed into his ribcage and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of her.

Standing in front of him, looking as perfect as ever, was Beth Chapel.

Beth’s eyes widened when she saw him. But then, not missing a beat, Beth smiled, “Wow it’s _the_ Rick Tyler.”

She approached them but stopped next to Malachi who wrapped his arm around her waist.

‘ _Oh_ ’ Rick’s felt his stomach drop, ‘Beth is the girlfriend from Nebraska.’

“Rick this is my girlfriend Beth! But I uh guess you already know each other?”

Malachi looked between the two curiously.

Beth nodded, “Yeah we went to the same school together.”

Rick made a sound of agreement, still too shocked to form words. Somehow even though he knew they both were going to Northwestern he imagined that the campus would be large enough to where he might never run into her. His heart ached with the sight of the girl he tried so hard to put behind him. Seeing her now Rick wondered why he ever thought he could possibly do that.

“Oh nice! Small world! Well I’m gonna go say hi to some other friends but I’ll check on you later babe.”

Malachi kissed the side of Beth’s forehead, causing Rick’s heart to clench, and walked off patting Rick on the shoulder as he left.

They both stared at each other awkwardly.

Despite everything, his soul warmed at the sight of her.

“How are you?” Beth smiled and asked gently, breaking the silence.

“I’m alright. How are you?”

“Yeah Im good”, she continued, “um... well it looks like you don’t have anything to drink. I keep a secret bottle of spiked sweet tea in Mal’s fridge if you want some?”

Rick ignored how his heart clenched at the nickname and chuckled lightly, “Uh yeah I’ll take some.”

Beth led them to the kitchen and poured two cups of tea before walking with Rick to a quiet isolated corner.

Beth leant into the corner sipping her tea as Rick stood in front of her.

In this isolated spot he took in her appearance. Her hair was styled into many long flowing braids. She wore a yellow sweater dress that accentuated every curve that Rick used to cling to. She looked as beautiful as ever. More than anything she just looked happier. Lighter. Less burdened.

Rick broke the silence, “So Malachi’s a pretty social guy?”

Beth laughed, “Yeah if he can be involved in it, he’ll do it.”

Rick smiled involuntarily at her laugh. He missed that sound.

Another pause.

“It’s good to see you. I’ve missed you.” Beth admits.

Rick smiled sadly, “Yeah I missed you too.... tore me apart when you left.”

Right after graduation Beth left Blue Valley and headed to Chicago for a summer internship with a renowned researcher named Dr. McNider who also taught Gen Chem here at Northwestern.

Beth smiled softly, “Yeah seems like I missed a bit when I left. I heard you and Jess got together...and then broke up.”

Rick grimaced thinking about the relationship he tried to throw himself into to dull the pain of Beth leaving, “Yeah it wasn’t that serious and we weren’t that compatible.”

“Mm.” Beth hummed.

“What?”

“Nothing... Its just I could’ve told you that.”

Rick chuckled humorlessly, “It might’ve helped if you had but you weren’t answering my messages so.”

Beth looked down and an awkward air filtered between then.

Rick, scared she would walk away, tried to recover the situation, “You look really well here Beth.”

Beth smiled before giggling , “Yup I decided to pull a 90s teen movie and come to college and get pretty.”

Rick scoffed, “You’ve always been pretty”, he paused and his voice lowered, “Very pretty. _Beautiful_.”

Beth looked at him her eyes filled with an emotion Rick dared not hope for, “Mm. Beautiful. Haven’t heard that one in a while.”

Rick’s eyes bore into hers, “Does Malachi not tell you you’re beautiful?”, he paused and then chuckled meanly, “Guess he’s probably too busy with all his clubs and anti global warming shit...”

Beth rolled her eyes but couldn’t help smiling.

Rick continued on, “Ya know I thought I did bad dating Jess but you’re dating a global warming denier.”

Beth laughed, “He just likes playing devil’s advocate a lot” and then continued shyly “Are you sure you’re not dating anyone problematic right now?”

“No Im not dating anyone right now at all.”

Suddenly the air changed between them and Beth looked at him worriedly.

She softly asked, “Are you finding it hard to meet people?”

Rick looked at her and couldn’t help but answer honestly, “Yeah, it’s different here from home.”

Beth nodded understanding, “Its very different from home. That’s probably why I’m so good at it”, she paused thinking, “You know I can introduce you to some of my girlfriends. I have those now!”

Rick scratches his hair and shrugged, “Eh I doubt I’d be there type.”

Beth stared at him confused before quietly asking him, “Whats not to like about you?”

Rick stared at her deeply before looking away, “I don’t know.”

* * *

_The next morning_

Beth rolled out of Malachi’s bed at 6am letting him continue to sleep.

She showered and got dressed before beginning to clean up the mess that was strewn around his apartment from last night.

At 8am when she was done she fixed herself a cup of hot tea and turned on the coffee machine so there would be coffee ready for him when he woke up.

Beth sat at the kitchen table reading and drinking her tea.

At 8:30am Malachi strolled into the kitchen yawning, “Hey babe, is the coffee ready?”

Beth smiled and pointed to the pot.

Malachi groaned happily, smiled at her, and began fixing himself a cup.

* * *

Beth dropped her stuff off in her dorm before grabbing some school work and heading to the cafe to meet some of her closest friends.

When she got to the cafe her friends were already all sitting at the table.

Yolanda had an arm thrown around Court’s chair, the couple was engrossed in each other discussing something animatedly.

Solomon and Bridget, who Beth affectionately dubbed the evil twins, were also in conversation.

Beth was very close to Court and Yolanda but also befriended Solomon who was great friends with Bridget.

When Court and Yolanda saw Beth they both perked up and waved her over.

“Beth!!!” Court exclaimed happily.

Beth smiled and gave them a hug before moving over to give Bridget and Solomon a quick hug too.

“Where’s Malachi?” Yolanda asked.

“Oh he had some club stuff to do so he couldn’t come.”

Court and Yolanda both gave an audible sigh of relief.

“Ooh thank Goddd”, Yolanda exclaimed, “You really are way too good for him Beth.”

Beth rolled her eyes and laughed but made no effort to defend him, ‘Maybe.’

Solomon interjected while rustling his platinum blonde hair and glancing at Beth, “So what’d you guys think of the party last night?”

The table went into conversation about who was doing weird shit and their favorite songs from the night before.

Suddenly, Bridget poked Beth from across the table, “That Rick guy from your old school was really cute Beth. Is he single?”

Beth stiffened at the question, “Um yeah... I think so.”

“Do you have his number?” Solomon asked his cold blue eyes burrowing into hers.

“Oh yeah. Um Bridget I’ll send it to you now.”

Bridget smiled excitedly, “Yay thanks Beth!”

* * *

“Vincent. I want to assume the best in you and say that you didn’t mean to re-explain to me exactly what I just argued in slightly different words. But that’s what you just did. And if you think I won’t hold you accountable for it even in a lecture class of 200 people you clearly don’t know me very well.”

The whole class oooed at Beth’s spot on check of their known sexist classmate.

Dr. McNider nodded proudly at Beth before continuing on with the lecture.  
Yolanda, who was sitting next to her, squeezed Beth’s arm, proud of her strong friend.

That night in Beth’s dorm all her friends and Malachi were listening to Yolanda gush about Beth’s big moment in Gen Chem.

“Guys you should have seen it! Beth totally ended that chauvinists life!! It was so so amazing.”

Beth blushed and looked down.

Malachi smiled proudly, “Thats my girl.”

Solomon snidely remarked, “Wow Beth. One sexist wounded, a billion more to go.”

A silence fell over the group. Yolanda and Court glared at his condescending tone, wondering why they put up with him.

Malachi awkwardly changed the subject, “Hey do y’all want some wine? I brought white and red!”

“Oooo yes please!” Bridget said excitedly.

Everyone else nodded their head in agreement.

Malachi pulled out some solo cups, opened the bottles and began asking everyone what they wanted and pouring it for them.

“Beth what would you like?”

Before she could respond Solomon interjected.

“She likes Red the best.”

Yolanda and Courtney glared at him.

“I think Beth can speak for herself.” Court stated sharply.

Malachi nodded, “Yeah she can. Beth what would you like?”

Beth flushed, she didn’t want to make this a whole big thing, and responded, “Um yeah I will take Red.”

Solomon smiled at her smuggly while Yolanda and Courtney groaned.

When Malachi poured her cup Solomon handed it to her. Beth noticed that his hand lingered on hers for a second longer than necessary.

* * *

  
That night, Beth was by herself in her dorm room laying wide awake in bed. She glanced at her clock. 2am.

Beth sighed and grabbed her phone from the bedside table.

‘The only way I’m getting sleep tonight is if I just do it.’

She unlocked her phone and searched through her contacts till she found his name.

 _Rick_.

Beth typed, deleted, and retyped the message over and over again before finally sending, “hey rick!”

Rick was awake in his dorm staring at his ceiling thinking of well... who he always thought about, when his phone dinged. He glanced at his phone haphazardly but his heart jumped when he saw the name on the screen.

Beth.

Rick opened the message from Beth reading it over and over again.

Beth laid in her bed nervously waiting for a response, ‘Ugh he’s probably not even up Beth.’

Then suddenly her phone started ringing.  
She stared at the Caller ID surprised.

Beth answered the phone nervously.

“Hello?” Rick asked

“Hey!” Beth chuckled awkwardly

“Is everything okay?” Rick asked concerned.

Beth stammered, “Oh yeah everything’s fine... it’s just um it was nice to see you at the party.” she paused taking a deep breath, “I really missed you.”

Rick felt his heart speed up, “I missed you too.”

Beth smiled softly on the other end of the line, “You know we never really attempted the just friends thing. Maybe we can give it a try?”

Right now Rick would take Beth in any fashion he could have her. He smiled in relief before responding.

“Yes. Yes I would like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!! Any predictions ? And also Beth and Rick as just friends?? Do you think they can actually do it?
> 
> Alsoooo what do y’all think of the new characters?? I’m most interested in your reaction to Solomon. He’s really nothing like show Solomon except that he’s a bit mean.
> 
> P.S. rick’s global warming info is true!!!


	5. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Beth and Rick are trying the just friends thing... HM. HMMMM. Yeah we'll see how long that lasts lol. Enjoy! :)

_A few days later_

Rick self consciously combed through his hair before knocking on Beth’s door. He could hear the laughter inside stop after his knock and then the familiar foot patter of Beth approaching the door. It reminded him of the times he would come to her house in Blue Valley, waiting at the door with an excited anticipation for the feeling of her warm embrace. Today though, Rick felt nervous. It was the first time he’d seen her since the call, and their first attempt at trying out being just friends.

The door swung open and Rick was met with Beth’s radiant smile, “Hey Rick!”

Rick smiled, “Hey Beth.”

“Come on in!”

Rick followed her into her dorm room. Her room was a large single with green and yellow accents throughout. String lights dangled from around her ceiling. There were live succulents on every flat top in her room. A yellow mandala tapestry hung behind her twin bed. The bed was moved over to one side leaving a large open space with a desk, a small white couch, and an olive green beanbag.

Rick stood next to Beth awkwardly looking at the 4 strangers that were already in the room.

“Guys this is Rick!”

Her friends all stared at him curiously. 

“Rick that adorable human is Courtney.” The girl she pointed to was sitting on the couch and waved kindly at him.

“That lovely person is Yolanda!” The girl right next to Courtney on the couch gave him a small, polite, tad bit skeptical nod.

“The cutie over there is Bridget” The brunette in the bean bag looked up at him through her eyelashes and gave him a small smile.

“And that… well thats just Solomon.” Beth rolled her eyes teasingly at the long legged blonde who was laid out on the ground.

Solomon looked Rick over and gave him a slight nod and continued to stare at him expressionlessly.

Rick waved nervously, “Uh hey. Thanks for letting me crash.”

Rick walked over closer to the group, slid off his backpack and sat with his back against the wall while Beth plopped down next to her things by the couch.

“So Rick you knew Beth from her old school?” Solomons gruff voice teared through the awkward air.

Rick nodded, wondering how much she had told her friends about him, “Yeah we’ve gone to school together since we were kids.”

Courtney pipped up, “Aw what was she like back in Nebraska?”

Rick met eyes with Beth who gave him a small nervous smile.

‘Misunderstod.’

“Smart. And kind.” He said looking away from Beth and to Courtney.

“Well duh.” Yolanda interjected, “What I want to know is if she’s always annihilated people who were spouting complete bullshit.”

Rick laughed lightly, recalling all the times Beth had raised her hand to politely call out a teacher's or other student's illogical arguments, “Yeah. Yeah she has.”

The group all joined in laughing.

“I knew it!” Yolanda smiled.

Solomon glanced at Beth before turning his eyes to Rick, “Mm classic Beth. On the surface she’s just the sweetest little thing but look a bit deeper and she’s secretly a fucking savage.”

Rick’s eyebrows furrowed at Solomon’s snide tone and at the piercing look Solomon was giving him.

‘Something is off about this guy.’

No one else seemed disturbed by him and the group all laughed before settling back into studying.

Rick glanced at Beth again, surprised to find that she was already looking at him.

‘You okay?’ She mouthed to him from the other side of the room.

Rick gave her a small smile and nodded before turning around to pull out his homework from his backpack.

* * *

“Bye guys!” Beth stood at the door waving to Court and Yolanda as they left. Solomon and Bridget had left earlier, leaving her alone with Rick.

Beth stood nervously at the door. This was the first time she had been alone with Rick in months. She took a deep breath and turned back towards her room.

She was surprised to see Rick was standing with his backpack on, picking up the empty snack bowls that Beth had brought out for her friends.

“You’re leaving?”

“Uh yeah, I should head off. Got to go to this magician showcase.”

Beth’s eyebrows raised in confusion.

“Oh my roommate Joey he’s a magician. Pretty good too.”

Beth laughed, “Oh okay. I’ll have to tag along to see one day.”

Rick smiled, “Yeah you should. I’d like that… and well uh he’d like that too.”

An awkward pause drifted between them.

“So what’d you think of my friends?”

Rick nodded and fidgeted with the strap of his backpack, “Oh yeah um Yolanda and Courtney were cool, Bridget seemed nice and…um Solomon. Well I’m not really sure I understand Solomon."

Beth laughed, “Yeah he’s can be a bit much but deep down he has a good heart. He actually was one of the first friends I made here. He appreciated my talkativeness, said that if he hung around me it would take the edge of his ‘sporadic biting remarks.”’ Beth paused and giggled, “Then I met Court and Yolanda. They actually met a long time ago in camp when they were kids and apparently both have had a crush on each other ever since! They didn’t have each other’s contact but when they met here they immediately recognized each other and in like a week they were dating! It was so cute! And then Solomon met Bridget and he stared bringing her around just recently to hang out with us, she’s pretty nice too.”

Rick nodded smiling, it was so good to see Beth happy and to learn about the people who had made her happier in life. He still wasn’t so sure about Solomon but if he made her happy and befriended her when she had no one… how could he complain?

  
“That’s great Beth. Im so glad that you’ve made all these friends. Its good to see you surrounded by people that care about you.” Rick responded sincerely.

“Thanks Rick. And I know as they get to know you more they’ll love you and they’ll be your friends too.”

Rick smiled at her but felt the old familiar creeping guilt come back, ‘How could she still be so kind to him after everything?’

“It feels good to be here with you Beth. No one else I’d rather do this college thing with.”

Beth smiled shyly, “Yeah me too.”

Rick smiled, handing her the bowls he picked up, and headed towards her door, “Hey tell Malachi that I’ll see him in science debate tomorrow and he better actually bring some real facts this time!”

* * *

  
_2 weeks later_

“So tell me the tea!” Beth teasingly asked Solomon. They sat together eating at a table in the cafeteria.

Solomon, while quiet, was amazingly observant. If something was going down 9 times out of 10 he knew about it.

“Well since cuffing season is upon us there’s a lot of romance in the air right now. Our very own Bridget made a move and texted Rick to ask if he wanted to go get lunch with her yesterday.”

Beth’s heart involuntarily lurched at this information. She tried to cover up her disappointment by over projecting, “Oh wow! That's awesome! So awesome!”

Solomon looked at her pointedly with a raised eyebrow, “Honestly I don’t know what you two think is so special about him. He seems a bit dense if you ask me.”

Beth stiffened at the remark, “Actually Rick is very smart. Sometimes he’s even smarter than me.”

Solomon shrugged and continued to tell her more drama that was happening between random people in his classes but Beth was far off. She couldn’t shake the sick feeling that she got thinking about Rick moving on to another girl. Another girl that she was friends with. That she couldn’t distance herself away from without it being awkward.

_‘Why can’t I stop loving him?’_

* * *

  
_2 days later_

“Wait so y’all used to fuck?” Court asked with wide eyes.

“Wow. And you think that you guys can be just friends?” Yolanda added.

Beth nodded timidly. She was sitting with the two in Yolanda’s room.

She sighed, “I don’t know guys. I hope so.”

“Was it serious?” Court questioned.

Memories ran through Beth’s mind.

_The silence of walking by him in the school halls._   
_The feeling of his arms wrapped tightly around her at the brink of dawn._   
_The cruel laughs of his friends._   
_‘I love you Beth. With everything I have I love you.’_   
_“I asked Jessie. She said yes.’_

“No.”

She lied.

* * *

  
_That Saturday night_

Beth, Malachi, Solomon, Bridget, Court, Yolanda and Rick were all hanging out at a bar.

Rick was sitting with Court and Yolanda at a table watching Beth, Malachi, Solomon and Bridget play pool.

They had been there for an hour and Rick was trying his best to fight the sick feeling that twisted his stomach anytime he saw Beth and Malachi touch.

He was able to do so successfully for most of the night as he found that he actually really liked Court and Yolanda. The three of them had been watching the soccer game that played on the bar TV, yelling at the screen and arguing about who was the best team this year.

Everything was fine until it wasn’t. A commercial came on and the three had turned to see how their other friends pool game was going.

Rick’s heart plummeted at what he saw.

Malachi was pressed behind Beth showing her how to correctly hold the pool stick. He watched as Malachi’s fingers wrapped around Beth’s, helping her properly hold it. Rick was struck with the physicality of it. He’d never gotten to touch Beth like this in public.

Malachi guided her to hit the ball, which hit another that got sent flying into a hole. He watched as the couple jumped up smiling happily and Beth threw her arms around his shoulders hugging him before Malachi moved back and brought his lips to hers.

_It was too much._

Suddenly Rick was pushing his chair back and getting up, “Hey guys I’ve got to go. I have a big exam in a couple days.”

“Aw okay we’ll see you later Rick!” Court smiled at him and Yolanda waved.

“Wait Rick! I need to go too!” Bridget called out to him, grabbing her purse and jacket.

Solomon rolled his eyes at his eager friend.

“See ya later man!” Malachi shouted.   
  
Beth stood next to Malachi, surprised and unsure of what to do about Rick’s sudden exit, “Oh okay! Well um bye! Be safe friends!”

She tried to ignore the stress she felt watching the two leave the bar.

* * *

  
_1 week later_

  
A peaceful silence filtered through Beth’s room as she sat on her couch studying. The only noise was the periodic flip of Rick’s chemistry notebook pages and the scratch of his pencil against the paper. The two sat on opposite ends of the couch doing work.

Beth relished in the silence. There were very few people in the world that could make Beth feel comfortable in complete silence. She usually was someone who felt better letting herself talk and talk for hours. With Rick though… It was just easy. It had always been.

She glanced at him a couple times from overtop her novel. He looked adorable when he was focused. The way his eyebrows furrowed in and how he would lick his lips when he was particularly puzzled. Beth realized that even after all this time she could just sit and watch him for hours.

‘Why did I think we could just be friends?’

  
In an effort to try to suppress thinking about the undeniable love she still had for him, Beth tried to fill the silence in the room.

“So how does it feel to have scored the highest grade on the Gen Chem exam?”

Rick looked up at her, she could see his flush of slight embarrassment, “Uh it was definitely surprising. But you know its mostly due to the fact that I actually do all the readings and homework”, Rick paused shaking his head, “Honestly I’m amazed at the way so many of the students here seem so confident yet they barely ever do any work.”

“Does that bother you?”

  
“Sometimes, yeah… Its like I just wish I could have some of that confidence in my life. I know I’m getting good grades but most of the time I feel like I don’t really belong here… like I’m an imposter”.

Beth nodded listening to him supportively, “Despite how you feel I can promise you that from the outside in no one would think you aren’t confident or that you don’t belong here. You’re so smart Rick. You were made to be here. I believe in you and everyone that really knows you believes in you too. However, none of that will matter if you don’t believe in yourself.”

Rick just looked at Beth, his eyes seemed to be able to see right into her soul. She remembers the first time he looked at her like that.

Beth smiled nervously and looked down, overwhelmed by the memory.

“You know”, Rick began, “sometimes I swear I used to think I could read your mind.”

Beth eyes snapped back up meeting Rick’s, ’So he can feel it too?’

“Hm. Really?” Beth squeaked, unable to fully form words that could take this conversation away from unearthing truths that could never be buried again. She’d never told him that she loved him before but somehow she wonders if he knows.

“Yeah” Rick nodded.

“When? In bed?”

“Yeah then… other times too.” Rick looked away, finally breaking eye contact.

Beth tried to remind herself to breathe and appear calm.

“Is that normal?” Rick muttered.

Her voice came back to her, “No. No its not.”

The silence that followed was thick in the air.

“Do your friends know what happened between us?” Rick asked softly.

“Court and Yolanda know some of it.”

“Would you be embarrassed if they knew?”

“Kind of. Yes.”

“Why?”

“Some parts of our situation were humiliating for me.” Beth admitted quietly.

Rick eyes became pained, “Was it the way I treated you?”

“Yes. But also the fact that I put up with it.”

Silence.

Beth could feel her nose begin to burn as she whispered, “Did you ever ever think about asking me to prom? I know its stupid but… Im just curious.”

Rick looked down regretfully before looking back at her, “I honestly never did. But God, Beth I wish I had. Would you have said yes?”

A tear slipped down Beth’s face that she quickly pushed away, “Yes.”

Rick leaned forward closer to her, “Im so sorry Beth. So sorry for everything I put you through.”, Rick’s voice broke, “Its the worse thing I’ve ever done to anyone and I did it to one of the few people I truly care about in this world. I think about it all the time… why I did it. It was terrible for me to make you think that it would be so awful for anyone to find out about us. It wasn’t you Beth. You’re perfect to me, you’re everything. I was lucky that you even liked me at all. And I just… I feel so guilty about how I treated you and how I hurt you. I want you to know that I found out at prom that everyone knew about us… they didn’t even care. It was all in my head. I am so sorry. I had so much anxiety about my social life that it terribly obscured my perception of everything. Its no excuse but thats what happened and Beth I am so sorry”

Beth nodded wiping away her falling tears. She could see and feel the honestly and sincerity in his voice and his eyes.

“I forgive you.” She whispered truthfully.

Rick felt his heart warm at the words. Again, she had given him a chance when he deserved none.

He wouldn’t mess it up this time.

“Thank you.”

* * *

_2 days later_

Beth knew that she cared about Malachi, maybe even loved him as a person. But suddenly, free from the burden of their rocky past, she knew that she could never feel about Malachi the way she felt just in the _presence_ of Rick.

She couldn’t let herself continue to deny her emotions and carry on dating Malachi when she knew she was in love with Rick. She had to do the right thing.

So she let him go.

“I think we should break up.” Beth said carefully on the other side of Malachi’s kitchen table.

Malachi balked, “What? Where is this coming from?”

“I just think its for the best.”

“But we’re good! Everyone says we’re good together. You challenge me intellectually. Ever since we first met I knew I had to date you because I’ve never had a better debate with anyone else. And I like to think I challenge you too. People tell me all the time that we could be like a power couple.”

“Mm do they?” Beth responded skeptically, “And even so, thats not a reason to stay together Mal.”

“Okay fine but why? Where is this coming from?”

“Because I can’t be for you what you deserve. I won’t ever be able to give you the love you deserve. And this is just not what I want anymore.”

Malachi paused and just stared at her.

“Its him isn’t it? You really have just changed so much since he got here. You used to be so present when you were with me. Always willing to debate about current events. Giving me all your attention and enthusiasm. Now I see that usually you’re somewhere else physically and mentally.” 

Beth hoped he wouldn’t ask but promised herself that if he did she would tell him the truth, “Yes its him. And its me too. I’m so sorry.”

Malachi shook his head and got up from his seat, “Just get all your shit out of my place. Goodbye Beth.” He stormed over to the front door of his apartment opening it and slamming it shut behind him.

Beth winced at the loud noise and buried her head in her hands fighting tears. Even though she knew it had to be done she hated hurting him.

* * *

_1 week later_

  
Beth’s head hurt as she woke up and she felt terribly groggy. She squinted at the bright light coming in through her dorm room window.

‘Oh gosh a hangover.’

She rolled to the edge of her bed and sat up realizing she was smelling something… oatmeal? Beth turned to look at her makeshift kitchenette and was surprised to see Rick standing by her microwave.

He smiled teasingly at her, “Ah you’re up? I know you’ve probably got a massive hangover. Im making some oatmeal for you and there’s hot tea on your bedside table.

Suddenly last night came back to her in pieces.

_Party at a friend of a friends house._

_Too much drinking. Guilt about hurting Mal. Drinking more. She’d never drank so much._

_“Yes were over.”_   
_“Thank God!! No wonder you look so good. Lost all that dead weight!” Yolanda laughed._

_Solomon calling her a heartbreaker._

_Rick’s eyes boring into hers as she told everyone._

_Rick holding her hand to tell her what he knew she needed to hear, “I know you feel guilty but Mal will be okay. You know him. He’ll meet somebody else.”_

_Wanting Rick badly._

_“I see how you look at me Rick… there’s no need to hide it anymore. I want you. Please I want you so badly.”_

_“Not tonight Beth. You’re too drunk.”  
_

_Trying to kiss Rick but he moved his head._

_Rick always staying near her. Keeping a watchful eye on her._

Beth flushed deeply at the memories from last night, “Oh gosh! Im so sorry for how I acted last night Rick.”

Rick chuckled, “Its all good. Cant say I’m complaining.”

Beth giggled shyly and moved to grab her tea, she was surprised to see a makeshift sleeping bed on the floor.

_He had spent the night._

“Thank you for taking care of me Rick.”

“Always.”

* * *

Rick sat on the edge of Beth’s bed waiting for her to finish showering. Last night was something that Rick thought he may only ever dream of. All in one sweep he learned that Beth was single again and that she wanted him. Now that today was here he knew Beth was still single but he no longer knew if she actually wanted him. Perhaps it was just drunken words of past desires.

He heard the shower shut off and 5 minutes later Beth opened the door wrapped in just a robe. The leftover water in her braids still dripping on the ground.

Silently Beth walked up to Rick.

The shy but determined look in her eyes was all too familiar to him. “ _Something more_ ” she had whispered to him that afternoon that felt like a lifetime ago.

Rick opened his legs for her to come in between.

He looked up at her as he slowly untangled the bathrobe tie. When it came open he stared at her bare body.

_His beautiful Chapel. The only place where he called out to God._

He kissed her stomach and buried his face in the soft skin. She smelled like vanilla and daisies. _Like home_. His hands came up to grip her waist and bring her closer into his face.

He heard Beth’s breath catch and could feel her relaxing into his touch.

He looked back up at her waiting, his eyes dark. He never knew he could need anything or anyone so badly. But, still, he wanted to hear her ask for him first.

“Please. I want this.” Beth moaned softly.

Rick groaned, aroused, and brought her into his lap. She sat in his lap completely naked besides the robe that was loosely draped on her arms.

Her hair was still dripping as Rick pulled her head down to his, capturing her lips.

The two groaned with need at the feeling of their lips connecting. ‘This’ Rick thought, ‘This always.’

Even after all this time their lips melded together perfectly like two halves of a whole. They kissed as if they had never stopped.

Their slow, lingering, savoring kisses quickly became desperate and frantic as Rick moved back to pull off his shirt and Beth pushed the robe fully off her shoulders.

Rick lifted her up and laid her beneath him in the bed, fully seeing her body for the first time in too long.

“God you are so beautiful Beth.” Rick murmured.

“So are you.” Beth whispered.

He leaned back down to kiss every inch of her, searing little ‘I love you’s’ into her skin, before finally joining them together. Beth’s body arched into his own, over and over she cried out in pure pleasure, the fingers on her small hands desperately gripped his broad back.

And just like that, they both knew that even after all this time she was his and he was hers.

* * *

The two laid cuddled in bed totally spent. Beth was lazily placing kisses on Rick’s shoulder. As Rick played with Beth’s braids.

Beth looked in his eyes, “Its not like this with other people.”

  
Rick nodded in agreement and kissed her shoulder, “We’ll be fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well they lasted a good month y'all lolol. Our pair is finally back together! Is it going to be smooth sailing from here on out...? You’ll just have to wait and see! Thanks for reading! I love reading y'alls comments so lmk how you're feeling :)


	6. Communication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will frustrate you. It will make you want to throw your phone. You may hate me after you read it. But the one thing I ask while you’re reading is to remember that yes this is a story about love, but it’s also a story about healing and growth. We have two wonderful and deeply in love individuas who are also very broken and are trying to grow and heal. Sometimes they will be there own biggest enemies. But I hope you have faith, like I do, that in time they work it out. For themselves and for each other.

_4 months later- April_

Rick laid snuggled into Beth’s chest as she absentmindedly ran her hands through his tosseled bed hair.

“Mmm I really don’t want to get up.” Rick mumbled.

Beth pressed a kiss on top of his head, “Then don’t. It’s Saturday and it’s only a bit after 9am.”

“I know but I haven’t been to my room all week. Joey will worry.”

Beth giggled, “Thats true. Joey will worry. He must think I’ve done some sort of magic spell on you.”

Rick chuckled and pressed a kiss on her chest, “If anything I think you might’ve done one on him. It was months before he let me touch his cards. You meet him for 20 minutes and he was handing them over.”

Beth giggled and they both snuggled each other more tightly.

“I really should go” Rick groaned after another few minutes but made no move to get up.

Beth untangled her hands from his hair and softly rolled them over so that she sat on top of his laid out body.

She leaned over him and kissed him slowly, pulling his bottom lip with her lips at the end.

She leaned back up and murmured, “Okay. Go then.”

Rick’s eyes were dark and he moved fast, pining Beth underneath him.

“Mm. Actually, I think I’ll stay a couple more hours.”

* * *

“Do my eyes deceive me? Could this be some fantastical magic?”

Rick laughed and plopped down on his bed throwing a pillow at Joey, “Hey dude.”

Joey laughed dodging the pillow, “Hey man. It’s good to see you! Wasn’t sure if I needed to go check lost and found or what!” he teased dramatically.

Rick rolled his eyes still smiling, “You know it’s a far walk from Beth’s place to mine and it’s getting really hot outside lately.”

“Oh please. I know you’d much rather spend your nights with Beth. No need to blame the elements!”

Rick smiled sheepishly looking down, “Alright you got me. It also helps that Beth doesn’t snore.”

Joey laughed, “Whatever dude!” And threw the pillow back at Rick.

Rick caught the pillow effortlessly and returned it back to its normal place chuckling, “So how’d your classes go this week?”

* * *

  
_1 week later_

_‘Dear Mr. Tyler we regret to inform you that at this time we have decided to move forward with other applicants for this summer...’_

Rick stared at the email, disappointment twisting his stomach. Not only was this job rejection a hit to his self esteem, it also made it impossible for him to stay in Chicago with Beth this summer. That is unless she let him stay at her place, but he didn’t want to impose on her and ask that.

With this rejection still looming over his head, Rick joined Beth and the rest of the crew for a hang out at the university pool.

Bridget was laid out on a pool chair tanning in the sun. She had been completely unfazed all those months ago when Beth nervously told her that she and Rick had gotten together, and quickly moved her eyes onto the next conquest.

Rick sat on the edge of the pool with his feet in the water watching Beth and Solomon play Courtney and Yolanda in pool volleyball.

When Beth asked him to play with her he shot her down. The email had casted a dark shadow over this whole day and he really didn’t even want to go to the pool. But he went anyway because he was trying, unsuccessfully, to act like nothing was wrong.

Unfortunately, his mood deteriorated even more as he watched them play. A fist clenching possessiveness was now in the mix of negative emotions plaguing Rick today.

Solomon kept finding ways to touch Beth while they were playing. Anytime Beth scored, Solomon would wrap his arms around her lifting her in the pool. Anytime Beth was about to serve he would massage her shoulders. Most egregious was when Solomon suggested they play piggy back volleyball.

He hoisted Beth up onto his shoulders as Yolanda did for Courtney. Watching Beth in her bright yellow bikini sit with on Solomon’s shoulder caused Rick’s jealousy to rear its ugly head.

After their game was over Beth swam over to sit next to Rick. Rick made no move to greet her and instead continued to stare at the pool.

She placed her hand on his arm, “Hey is everything okay? You look like you’re trying to burn a hole through the water with your eyes.”

Rick quickly moved his arm away from Beth’s touch and snapped at her seething, “I don’t know. Maybe having to sit here and watch Solomon rub all on you, and you just _letting_ him has pissed me off.”

Beth stared at him shocked, “He was not all on me. He was just trying to be a supportive friend. And the only reason we were playing together is because you have been completely standoffish all day and wouldn’t play with me. So Solomon tried to be a good friend and offered to. But the worst part of all of this is that I can see your upset about more than just this but you won’t tell me what’s going on, and now you’ve pushed everything your feeling to somehow be my fault. It’s not fair Rick, I don’t deserve that.”

Beth stood up, upset, and walked away to lay in a pool chair.

Rick kicked the water, annoyed, and continued to brood at the poolside.

It didn’t take long for Rick to begin to regret what he’d said and 20 minutes later he got up to sit on the edge of the pool chair Beth was laid out on.

Rick placed his hand softly on Beth’s leg rubbing it with his thumb, “I’m sorry Beth. I’ve just been stressed about final exams and school work, that’s all. And you’re right. I just piled that all on you when all you’ve ever done is be there for me. I’m sorry.”

He still wasn’t ready to tell her about the job rejection but he never wanted to hurt her.

She looked up at him with her big brown eyes, “I know you are. I just wish you’d be more open with me about what’s going on. I’m here for it all. The good, the bad, and the ugly.”

Rick nodded and laid next to Beth pulling her into his arms. She snuggled up into his chest pressing a kiss over his heart.

Things settled between the two for a while before they hit another bump in the road that same day.

Later on the friends were all sitting at a pool side table eating lunch and playing a lazy version of never have I ever.

“Would you guys ever do a threesome?” Bridget teasingly asked the group.

Court and Yolanda both balked shaking their heads no.

Solomon laughed, “Eh. I’m not 100% against it.”

Bridget smiled, “Well I know I’d 100% be down for one. What about you Beth?”

“Uh probably not. The only way I could see myself doing one is if Rick asked for it.”

Rick stared at her shocked and confused.

“Interesting! And Rick would you ever want to do a threesome?”

“No.” Rick answered immediately, his voice gruff, “I don’t like to share.”

The group all laughed and started off into another conversation.

Rick turned to talk to Beth whispering, “Did you mean what you just said?”

Beth flushed nervously, “I mean yeah. If it was something you wanted to try I’d probably try it.”

Rick eyes bore into hers searching, “But you wouldn’t want to do one normally?”

Beth shook her head, “No. no. No of course not. I only want you. Im sorry if that came off incorrectly.”

Rick stared at her still in disbelief, “So in a world where I would want to have a threesome you would do it, even though you don’t want to, just because I wanted it?”

Beth nodded shyly.

Rick pulled away from her, “What? Beth I would never want you to do anything you don’t want to just because I may like it.”

She tried to cover up what she had implied but ended up making it abundantly clear, “Oh no. It’s just that um I, would do anything to make you happy. That’s all Rick.”

But the true implications of what she said fully dawned on Rick. It was like he could see right into the heart of the damage her parents had done to her. He saw that even now she feared abandonment and the toxic touch of loneliness.

He wished he could tell he that he would never willingly leave her. That in the whole world the one thing he knew for certain is that he would always want to be with her. That he could never stop loving her. And that just as she feared his abandonment, he feared hers.

But Rick didn’t know how to say all of this, especially with her friends nearby, so he decided to leave it alone.

* * *

  
_about 2 weeks later_

Beth was walking to her first class of the day when her phone rang. She dug her phone out of her pocket, then stared at the caller ID on her ringing phone unsure of what to do.

‘Mom’

Before she could change her mind she answered the phone.

“Hello?” Beth greeted nervously.

“Hi Beth.” Her mom’s familiar voice rang through. She sounded tired but like herself.

“Hi! Um is everything okay?” Beth asked.

“Yes. I just wanted to hear your voice. I hope college is treating you well. I know you must be scoring very highly.”

Beth was touched by her mom’s words and wondered if during their time apart her mom had gotten better, “Yeah it’s going well mom. I miss you.” Beth said truthfully.

A notable pause drifted through the phone line.

“Well I know summer is coming so I just want you to know that your father has not been home in a while. We’re still together but I haven’t seen him in weeks. So if you plan on coming home at all in the summer don’t be surprised if you don’t see him.”

Beth was shocked, unable to find words.

“Okay, well I need to go back to work sweetheart. Just text me if you do end up deciding to visit this summer.”

Then she hung up.

Beth stood unmoving listening to the droning dial tone. Her eyes watched the world crack before her.

That night, Rick was cuddling Beth from behind in her bed when he felt her begin to shake a little.

“Beth?” Rick asked worried and leaned up to see her face.

She was crying but trying to hold in the tears.

Rick cradled her face with one hand concerned, “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head softly, “It’s nothing. I just am a bit emotional for some reason today”, she tried to laugh it off.

Rick stared at her worriedly trying to decide whether he should push her clearly evasive answer.

‘No. She’ll tell you when she’s ready.’

“Okay.” Rick whispered kissing her forehead and settling back down behind her.

* * *

_1 week later_

_Sometimes things just fall apart._   
_Love without truth,_   
_love without confidence,_   
_and love without trust_   
_is love condemned._

“Beth I have to go home for the summer.” Rick began nervously, “I know that you’ll still be here in Chicago for your research with Dr. McNider, so we’ll be apart for a few months.”

Rick paused and stared at Beth who looked at him with an unreadable expression. He had hoped she might offer to let him stay with her. But she made no move to say anything so Rick wondered out loud if this meant she didn’t want to do long distance.

Rick nervously sputtered, “Yeah um I know that’s a long time so i don’t know, did you want to see other people?”

Beth eyes widened before she wrapped her arms around herself.

‘He wants to see other people?’ She thought insecurely.

“Oh okay.” Beth muttered trying her hardest to fight back tears.

Rick felt his heart begin to crack, ‘She does want to see other people?’

“Fine. I’m just gonna head out. Have a good summer.” Rick whispered and left quickly so that he wouldn’t lose his composure.

As soon as he had left her dorm he walked down the halls with his hands pressed into his eyes trying to fight off the sting of tears.

In her dorm, tears streamed down Beth’s face as she tried to understand how they got here.

* * *

_2 months later_

The smell of Blue Valley air brought a wave of mixed emotions through Beth.

So much had happened in this small town. So much love and so much pain.

Beth stood outside of her house waiting for Rick. She had texted him out of the blue to ask if he could give her a ride to her father’s apartment. She was visiting Blue Valley for the weekend to see her parents. And she still had never learned how to drive.

Beth watched the familiar old yellow mustang pull into her driveway and roll up in front of her.

She opened the door and hopped in, turning to greet Rick.

The last 2 months were good to him. He was now sporting a beard that made him looked older and somehow even more handsome.

“Hey Rick, thanks so much for the ride.” Beth greeted forcefully.

“Hey Beth” he offered with a tight smile.

The air between them was charged with a mix of anger and longing.

“How have you been?” Beth tried to ask politely but her piercing eyes betrayed her.

“Been good. Doing research and TAing for summer classes at the local college.”

“Oh that’s good and how is your mom?”

“She’s fine. She’s alright.”

They fell into another silence.

Rick couldn’t help himself and asked a touch snidely, “So how have you been? Met someone special this summer?”

Beth couldn’t believe him, ‘Is he giving me attitude right now? About doing what he broke up with me to do?’

The truth was that Beth had spent most of the past 2 months throwing herself into her work to avoid falling into pieces. Yet again, Rick proved to her that his claims of love were fickle. Unfortunately, this realization also made Beth’s deepest insecurities feel true. ‘Maybe I’m not worthy of happiness or love. Maybe my parents just figured it out first.’

“Ive been good Rick. And yeah, no one special in particular.”

She saw Rick relax a bit. This annoyed her and that annoyance drove Beth to lie, hoping to incite a little anger.

“I did download Tinder though.”

Beth watched Rick’s grip on the steering wheel tighten, smiling a little smugly to herself.

“Oh? How’s that?”

“Mm. Pretty interesting. So many many options, it’s hard to know where to focus.”

Rick said nothing and Beth pushed herself to ask, “Have you met someone special this summer?”

‘Was breaking my heart again worth it?’

Rick scoffed, “No. I’m more of a loner. You know me.”

He couldn’t believe that she was sitting here flaunting the men she was talking to. Men that she didn’t even really know. But somehow they still stopped her from trying a long distance relationship with him. Yet again, Rick felt his heart breaking. He had hoped when she texted him out of the blue that maybe she had regretted what she’d decided. He’d hoped that maybe she would want to try again. But instead she seemed colder towards him than ever.

“I used to.” Beth muttered.

The silence that followed was uncomfortable and lasted the entire rest of the ride.

When they pulled up to her father’s apartment, Beth told Rick to wait in the car, despite his protests.

Beth found his apartment and peered through the front window. She saw her dad reclining in a chair watching TV. His whole place looked terribly messy. Beth saw empty take out boxes and beer cans strewn around. Bottles of hard alcohol covered the kitchen table.

Beth knocked on the window to get his attention and waved.

Her father looked up, walked over to the window and stared at Beth for a second.

“Go.” He grumbled through the glass and closed the blinds.

Beth stared at the now closed window in shock.

She was still determined to talk to him so she moved to the door and began banging on it, “Dad! Dad! Please let me in! Talk to me!”

After a minute Mr. Chapel yanked the door open as far as the metal latch allowed him to and spoke through the crack.

“Leave me alone Beth! Go stay with your mom!”

He slammed the door back in her face.

Beth could still smell the alcohol on his breath as she wrapped her arms around herself and turned to walk back to Rick’s car.

When she opened the door and got in tears were streaming down her face. She felt Rick wrap his arms around her, pulling her into his arms.

Beth cried in his shoulder as Rick ran his hand up and down her back, “I’m here Beth. It’s going to be okay. I’m here.”

After a while Beth’s tears subsided and she settled back into her seat. Rick began the drive back to her house, holding her hand the entire way back.

* * *

  
_Sophomore Year_

In the first month of Sophomore year, Rick pushed himself to branch out more. He found new friends in club soccer and he became president of science debate. He roomed with Joey, who he now considered his best friend. He still hung out from time to time with Court and Yolanda and Beth. The way he and Beth separated was still painful for him but it was more painful for him to not see or talk to her.

Rick was hanging out with Court and Yolanda for the first time in a while after Thanksgiving break. Yolanda texted him saying that she and Court needed to talk to him. He met them at their shared apartment.

“Beth and Solomon are dating.”

Rick nodded at this info trying his hardest to appear unaffected by this sickening news.

“You don’t have to pretend Rick. We all know you’re still in love with her. And we know that she is still in love with you.” Yolanda said sadly.

Rick grunted pushing his head into his hands.

“If that’s what you guys know then why are you telling me this? You know how hearing this make me feel right?”

“We know, and believe me we’re only telling you this because we’re worried about her.” Court explained.

Rick immediately looked up at them, “Whats going on?”

“When’s the last time you’ve seen her?”

“Um well probably around the last time I saw you guys. You know I was really busy with school work and clubs the two weeks before thanksgiving break and then I went home. She didn’t come back to Blue Valley for break. So yeah it’s been just over 3 weeks.”

“Well she started officially dating Solomon the week before thanksgiving break. They both were here over break. And we think they pretty much spent the entire time together. She just hasn’t really been herself Rick. We’ve tried to talk to her about it but she brushes us off completely. I know this is a lot to dump on you but maybe just try to check on her? See if you see what we’re talking about.”

“Yeah of course. Thanks for letting me know.”

* * *

_The next day_

Rick sat at table outside a local cafe anxiously waiting for Beth to arrive.

Right after talking to Court and Yolanda he texted Beth to ask if she wanted to meet up. He was happy to see that she responded 30mins later saying that she could meet him the next day.

When Beth arrived he immediately could see that something was different. She looked really good but Rick also saw that her posture was less cheery and that she seemed somewhat sad and tired. She was wearing a black sweater with dark blue jeans and black boots. Most notably, her hair was straight it came down past her shoulders. Rick thought it looked nice but found that he missed her bouncy curls.

“Hey!” He stood up greeting her with a hug.

Beth smiled and hugged him back, but her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

He noted she even smelled different. Her usual vanilla daisy scent was now more like a robust amber.

They both sat down and began to talk.

It didn’t take long for Rick to truly be concerned about her, ‘Yolanda and Court were definitely right. Something is off.’

Her large eyes that were usually bright seemed dull. Beth was known for her chipper tone but she seemed flat and like any happiness she tried to project was forced.

Rick carefully searched for what was wrong.

“How are your classes going?”

“Oh really well! Yeah I’ve been TAing a couple classes this year and also working with Dr. McNider more closely which has been wonderful. What about you?”

“Yeah I’ve been doing well. Really coming into my element I think finally. I’ve been mentoring some freshmen that have the same scholarship as me and that’s been really rewarding for me. My belief in them has really helped increase my belief in myself.”

“Oh that’s awesome Rick!”

“Thanks Beth. My mom is like ‘finally!’ Also she told me over break to tell you hello and that she misses you.”

Beth smiled sadly, “Tell her I miss her too.”

“How’s your mom?”

Beth nodded, “Yeah she’s just about the same. Seems to think avoiding everything will somehow make her problems go away.”

Rick watched Beth carefully, she was clearly sad about her family but it didn’t seem to be any more so than she had been a couple months ago. Not enough to cause this change he now saw in her.

‘Alright. Let’s try this’ Rick thought.

“And how’s Solomon?”

Beth immediately pulled her hands into her lap and looked to the side before meeting his eyes.

‘It _is_ him.’ Rick realized.

“Who told you?” Beth asked.

“Who do you think?”

Beth nodded twisting her interlocked hands.

“He’s fine. Um you know his usual self. I wish I could bring you two around each other more without you both having a pissing contest.”

Rick laughed, “Mm do you tell Solomon this too?”

Beth shook her head, “No, because from where he’s standing you’re the other tall guy in the group that used to fuck his girlfriend.”

Her words struck a nerve.

Rick stared at her incredulously, “Is that how you describe our relationship to other people?”

Beth looked down, “I don’t really talk too much about us to other people. Especially not our past sex life.”

“Mm. Too bad.”

Beth gave Rick a pointed look.

Rick carefully pressed on trying to act like he wasn’t bothered. He knew if he tried to take the upperhand that Beth would try to usurp it and end up revealing more than she planned to, “So how’s the sex?”

Beth flushed, but just as Rick predicted she wouldn’t let him have the upperhand so she told him what he wanted to hear, the truth, “Solomon has interesting sexual preferences.”

Rick leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest, “Oh?”

“Yup. He’s the most turned on when he’s inflicting pain.”

Rick fingers dug into his arms as he stared at her, “And you enjoy that?”

“It’s different but I don’t hate it. Yeah I guess I enjoy it.”

“You don’t sound so convinced to me.”

“I wouldn’t let him do it if I didn’t enjoy it Rick.”

“You say that but I remember you once telling me that you would do anything to make me happy. Even things you wouldn’t want to do normally. And when we were together you never asked me to do anything like that to you. So are you sure that you’re not just allowing this to make him happy?”

Beth squeezed her hands together looking down at them in her lap, “What we had was different. With Solomon I let him do that because I have to pretend that he has power over me. But with you Rick, I would have actually done anything for you. So there was no need to pretend.”

Beth looked to the side sighing, blinking back tears and frusturation, before hesitantly meeting Rick’s eyes, “Anyway. How are you?”

* * *

  
_about 3 weeks later_

Beth stood in her apartment kitchen next to Solomon. Court, Yolanda and Bridget were also there. They were all pregamming to go out when she felt her phone vibrate.

She looked down at the Caller ID

Unknown

She stared at the phone confused and then answered it.

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

She’d recognize that voice anywhere.

“Rick?”

She felt Solomon stiffen next to her, he placed his hand on her arm.

“Hey.... uhhhh... sorry. I um. Got in a little bit of trouble” Rick slurred.

Beth felt her heart clench in worry, he was clearly drunk and something had happened.

She moved away from Solomon and into the hallway of her apartment.

“What happened? Are you alright.”

“Um I’m alright.. I just now have no money or phone so can I just stop at yours? I can pay you back for the cab fare later.”

“Of course. Come.”

“Okay I’ll be there in 10”

Beth stood outside waiting in the crisp winter air for Rick. Unable to focus on anything else.

About 11 minutes later she saw the taxi cab pull up and Rick step out.

She felt her stomach drop, he had a faint black eye and a nasty busted lip, the blood from which had stained his shirt.

“Rick” Beth walked up to him reaching out but then wrapped her arms around herself stopping a couple feet in front of him, “Oh my God.”

Rick tried to smile assuringly, “It’s not as bad as it looks.”

Beth stared at him, unbelieving, before remembering the cab.

She leaned over and handed the cab driver money thanking him.

As he drove away Beth looked Rick over again before bringing him inside.

Once in the hall of her apartment building Beth turned to talk to him, “What happened?”

“Uh ive been out a little with some soccer buddies and I was on my way home. And this guy he told me to hand over my phone and wallet but I said no. So he punched me and ran off with it” Rick chuckled a little drunkly at himself.

He moved closer to Beth taking her hand in his, “I’m fine. You’re phone number was the only one I knew by heart.”

Rick paused and smiled, “I’m really sorry um I’m really drunk.”

Beth just stared at him curious and concerned. Usually, seeing people very drunk put her on edge but she knew Rick. He’d never hurt her. In fact, currently the only person he looked like he might accidentally hurt was himself.

Beth smiled softly at him, “I can tell.”

Rick chuckled lowly, staring into Beth’s eyes, “Do I still have pupils?”

Beth searched his dark eyes, “Mmm just barely.”

Rick leaned his head a little bit closer to hers, still holding her hand, “They always get like that when I see you anyways.”

Beth leaned back, “Oh yeah you must be drunk.”

Rick stared at her confused, “What do you mean?”

“Solomon’s just in the other room.”

Suddenly, Rick remembered that yes Beth was not his anymore and yeah he wasn’t really hers anymore either. That info sobered him up a bit.

He smiled his eyes pained and pulled his hand away from hers, “Oh.”

He started back towards the apartment building entrance, “I guess maybe I’ll just head back out and get punched in the face again.”

Beth softly laughed and moved to him pulling him back towards her.

She placed her hand delicately on his black eye and broken lip. Silently urging him to come inside the apartment with her.

Rick sighed relenting and followed her inside.

* * *

“Fucking low life scum” Solomon grumbled from Beth’s kitchen table.

Rick stood on the other side of the kitchen, “What?”

“Fucking low life scum” Solomon repeated slower.

Rick laughed, “Quite a word coming from you Solomon.”

Court, Yolanda, Beth, and Bridget all stared between the two nervously.

Rick continued chuckling, “We can’t all be the son of millionaires.”

The group laughed with Rick, trying to lighten the mood, but Solomon sat silently.

He glanced at Beth before looking back to Rick “Well I’m talking about the shithead that mugged you for drugs so.”

“Drugs?” Rick balked at the assumption.

“Yeah, what do you think he’s going to buy Rick? Milk for his little kids? Your money will be up his veins in a bit.”

Courtney interjected, “So are you sure you’re alright Rick? Looks like it hurts.”

Rick smiled at her, “Yeah I’m alright Court. It’s not as bad as it looks.”

“Well if you’re alright then maybe we can head out now!” Bridget chimed in, ready to go to some parties.

Yolanda rolled her eyes. “So considerate Bridget.”

“What? He just said he was fine.”

“I am.” Rick assured.

Suddenly Beth spoke up, “You guys go. I’ll get this one cleaned up and join you all in a bit.”

Everyone, except Solomon, got up and hugged Beth and Rick as they exited her apartment.

Solomon still sat in the kitchen chair for a second staring at Beth before getting up and walking over to her.

They stood on the opposite ends of the kitchen. Beth near the back with Solomon while Rick stood at the entrance.

“You sure?” Solomon asked with a clipped tone, tracing her arm up and down with one of his hands.

Beth nodded and Solomon leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. Then he moved back and stared at her for a second before moving away towards the kitchen entrance.

The whole exchange made Rick sick on multiple levels. While Rick always hated seeing Beth with someone else, this was even worse because he could see how Solomon tried to make her feel small. Make her feel underneath his control. Always trying to establish his power in every situation. She didn’t seem scared of him which assured Rick but she did seem more docile in his presence. And Rick hated that. Beth was sweet but she was anything but docile.

As Solomon passed Rick he didn’t even look at him.

“Rick.” He said gruffly. _A warning and a claim._

“Solomon.” Rick responded in kind.

After he left, the kitchen was silent for a minute as Rick and Beth stood on opposite ends of the space.

The silence was heavy.

Rick stared at the door Solomon left out of disgusted.

He turned towards Beth who was already looking at him.

“You could have a different boyfriend you know.”

Beth rolled her eyes and turned towards her counter starting to fix some tea.

“I mean... from what I hear guys are consistently falling in love with you.”

Beth gripped the counter and looked at him frustrated, “Stop that.”

“I’d rather it were literally anyone else Beth.”

Beth turned back to the counter trying to focus on the tea and ignore Rick.

His voice got louder and more biting, “I’d rather the guy who fucking mugged me today be your boyfriend.”

Beth snapped her head back towards him, “Why do you care?”

Rick glared at her, “Do you love him?”

The hot water from the teapot was now boiling.

Beth moved to her cabinets to grab two tea bags and two mugs, “We dont talk about this kind of stuff do we Rick? It’s a bit off limits for us.”

Rick nodded angrily, “Alright okay.”

Beth placed her tea bags into the cup and placed them on the counter.

Rick couldn’t stand seeing her like this so he pushed her harder, “I haven’t mentioned this before but I’ve recently been seeing someone. Maybe I should’ve mentioned this but then again I feel like we barely see each other. We hardly spend _any_ time together. Anyway, her name is Helen, I don’t know if you know her she’s a sophomore too. She studies psychology.”

Beth leaned into her counter her hands balling up into fists as she breathed shakily, “So then why are you trying to get me to break up with Solomon?”

“No I’m not. I just want you to be happy that’s all.”

“Cause you’re such a good friend?” Beth bit back.

Rick nodded, “Uh yeah... I um.. yeah.”

Beth stared at him before turning around bursting into tears.

“Oh, Beth Im sorry.” Rick crossed the room to hold her, “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you before.”

He reached out to pull her into his arms but she moved away, “I don’t want to talk to you Rick just leave.”

Rick moved closer to her again trying to touch her but she moved away again, “Please can you just go!”

Rick stopped and stood by her leaning his head against his hand and she continued to cry.

“Look Im sorry um but I actually can’t go. I can’t get home. Um could I still borrow the money for the ride back like you said?”

“Oh yeah.” Beth nodded still sniffiling , “I managed to forget you’d been mugged. I’ll go get it.”

When she returned handing him the money the two stood in front of each other silently.

Rick looked down before looking up at her teary face, “I don’t know what happened with us last summer. Like when I had to go home.... See I kind of hoped that I would’ve been able to stay here. That you would’ve let me stay here with you.”

Rick watched Beth wrap her arms around herself and break eye contact with him.

He looked away too, “Yeah I just don’t really know what happened between us to be honest.”

She made a look of confusion before looking back to him, “You said you wanted to see other people.”

Rick shook his head confused, “No.”

Beth stammered, “Yeah... I thought you were breaking up with me.”

Rick eyes grew pained and he looked down shaking his head, ‘Oh my... oh my God.’

Beth continued on confused beginning to tear up again,

“You never said anything about wanting to stay here with me.

I....

That would’ve been...

Always.

Obviously.”  
  


Rick couldn’t look at her anymore he didn’t know how to process any of this information, “Um well I should go.”

He headed out the door staring at the cracked and fragmented world they had created for themselves.

The past few months nothing had really felt right or true. As if they had all been living in some sort of parallel universe.

And now they both realized that the sadness they had both been struggling with for months, they created themselves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I know. We’re sad. But there’s still 3 more chapters left. There’s still plenty of time for our two favs to get it figured out. Like I said, the love is there. And where there is love there is a chance.
> 
> Leave a comment below! I love to read y’alls reactions ❤️


	7. Florida

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy 🖤

_6 months later_

The smell of salt water and the sound of waves crashing against the shore were the senses that overwhelmed Rick as he and Joey walked up to the nicely sized cream colored beach house.

Joey knocked on the door and a few minutes later they were greeted with Bridget’s excited smile. 

“Hey guys! Welcome! Come on in and drop your bags wherever. The others are in the back.”

Rick greeted her and entered the house. He placed his small suitcase near the staircase, looking around the warm vacation home.

His eyes were immediately drawn to a picture sitting on the nearby living room dresser.

He picked it up and stared curiously at the family that smiled up at him.

In the picture was a small toddler with big brown eyes that he recognized immediately as Beth. She was sitting in her mom’s lap on the beach. Her dad was kneeling behind her mom smiling, his arms were wrapped around them.

Even then Beth had the most wonderful smile. Rick’s heart ached for Beth seeing this happy photo of her family, knowing how fragmented it was now.

He sat the photo back down and headed to the back to find the others with Joey.

The back of the beach house had a lovely patio with a rectangle dining table. It was adorned with string lights hanging from the overhanging palm trees.

Sitting at that table, in black swim trunks and an open dark blue beach shirt was Solomon.

Rick stiffened when he saw him and Solomon gave him a small cocky smile.

“Ohhh look who it is. Ricky and his magician.”

Rick glared at him, while Joey tried to ease the tension.

“Very funny Solomon. Good to see you too”, Joey offered with a tight smile.

Solomon gave them a half hearted wave and then gestured to the beach that the patio led to.

“My girlfriend’s somewhere out there trying to collect seashells or some shit like that if you’re looking for her.“

Rick rolled his eyes at Solomon’s mocking tone. He and Joey kicked off their shoes by the patio and headed to the beach. 

  
Rick could see Beth, who instead of picking up seashells, was laid out in the sand a little bit down the beach.

It had been about a month since he’d last seen her. Beth decided to spend the summer at her families vacation home and had invited all her friends to come join her when they could. Solomon had been staying with her for a few weeks and Bridget was staying for this whole week. Rick and Joey, who were road tripping across the US for two weeks, made their stop here in Florida for a few days. A few days that unfortunately overlapped with Solomon being here and Court and Yolanda’s vacation to Paris.

This calamitous timing meant that Rick and Solomon had to be around each other for a whole weekend with only Beth, Bridget and Joey to try to buffer the awkwardness.

Rick took in Beth’s appearance as he got closer. She still hadn’t noticed him or Joey. The waves covered the sound of their approaching. She laid in the sand with her eyes closed wearing a black swimsuit and a sheer beach cover. Her curly hair was pulled up into a bun.

Rick could only tell she was awake by the slow movement of her hand as she brushed her fingers through the sand.

Joey looked at Rick and gave him a sly smile.

He motioned for Rick to continue forward as he moved in a different direction to sneak behind Beth.

When in position next to her Rick announced himself, “Hey Beth.”

Beth’s eyes opened and a smile immediately began forming on her face.

She turned to look at him, “Rick!”

As she started to sit up, Joey made his attack.

“BOO!”

Beth jumped a little yelling, “JOEY! Oh my god you scared me!”

The two boys both started laughing while Beth gave them both an annoyed look.

“Seriously you two...” Beth drifted off and then her eyes gleamed mischeviously, “Bet you won’t be laughing so hard if you get sand in your hair!”

Beth grabbed a first full of sand and started getting up as the boys ran away.

Beth chased them to the water and they all ran in, splashing each other with water.

Rick felt his heart warm, he was so happy to be here with her and to see her laughing. The past few months had been straining for them.

The situation between them seemed so muddy. Last summer’s miscommunication drove them apart, as did fear, and now they both had begun dating different people.

It was hard to know where exactly to go, or how to feel. Both of them knew they still loved the other but was that enough? Love hadn’t saved them before. And they didn’t know anymore if their love was still reciprocated. Maybe not with the pain they seemed to continue to cause each other. 

Because of these confusing emotions for the last few months of sophomore year Rick and Beth had been awkward friends. There was no longer any animosity between the two, just a general sense of not knowing where to go from here.

Running around the ocean shore was the first time in a while that he and Beth had been truly happy together. All thanks to Joey’s genius thinking to break the ice.

Once the three trudged back from the sea, Joey told them that he had to run ahead to make a phone call. He left Beth and Rick alone to walk together back to her family’s beach house.

The air between the two once Joey left was both awkward and charged.

“So how’s your epic National Lampoon road trip going?“ Beth asked trying to avoid any uncomfortable silences.

Rick chuckled, “Oh it’s been great. Me and Joey taking on the US in my old yellow mustang. I’ve seen so much more than I could’ve ever imagined.”

“That’s awesome Rick! I’m so glad you decided to stop by here.”

Rick smiled timidly, “Of course”, he paused and then chucked joking, “plus what can beat free lodging?”

Beth giggled and then wrapped her arms around herself, “So how’s Helen?”

Rick looked away stammering, “Uh she’s alright. Yeah she’s good. Since her family lives in New York and so does Joey’s that’s gonna be our last stop. I’m going to drop him off there, visit her, and then head back to Nebraska.

Beth nodded, “That sounds fun.”

“And how’s Solomon?” Rick tried to ask pleasantly but failed, sounding strained.

Beth looked down at the sand underneath her toes, “Um honestly... I don’t know. He’s been really on edge ever since I told him that you and Joey were headed here. I don’t know why... I swear it’s like I just can’t get him to understand me sometimes. But I’m determined for us to have a good time so don’t worry about it okay?”

Rick nodded, mentally preparing himself for what was to come as they made it back to Beth’s house.

Solomon was now standing on the porch, leaning on the railing, “Gosh you two both look like wet dogs.”

Rick glared at him hating how he managed to scorn Beth too. He was accustomed to Solomon shooting digs at him but he usually was quite reverent of Beth.

‘She’s right. He really is a bit on edge.’

Beth laughed it off expertly and slinked up the stairs to Solomon. She wrapped her arms around him from behind pressing her wet body against his dry one.

“If I’m so gross then whyyy would you let me be up on you like this.”

Solomon rolled his eyes but didn’t move away, instead he leaned a bit back into her embrace, “I don’t know Beth, guess I’m just a wimp.”

Rick continued on into the house not wanting to watch the two of them, “I’m gonna go find a shower!”

Before he could get too far in the house he heard Beth call out to him and excitedly run inside.

“Wait! Rick Im making dinner tonight but I’ve got to head out to the local store. I was thinking about biking into town if you want to join me. There’s only two working bikes here but since you haven’t seen town.... I thought I’d take you in today. And Joey tomorrow if he wants.”

Rick couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm, “Yeah that sounds great. I’ll be ready in an hour?”

“Perfect. Also there are two empty guest rooms so you can pick whichever.”

Suddenly Joey called down from upstairs, “I already called dibs on the bigger one Rick! You snooze you lose!”

Rick rolled his eyes, “‘ _I have to take a phone call_ ’ my ass. He really is a magician with all those tricks and distractions.”

Beth laughed and Rick grabbed his suitcase trudging up the stairs to his room.

* * *

About an hour later Rick and Beth started their trip into town on their bikes.

Beth changed into a lovely knee length white spaghetti strapped casual beach dress. Rick was wearing into a pair of light brown cackys and a dark blue shirt.

Beth took them down a sandy dirt road that had breathtaking views of the ocean.

The two biked next to each other smiling and laughing, pointing at different things they noticed happening on the beach.

They raced a little, Beth winning by a hair.

Then Rick started showing off for fun by biking a bit down the path with no hands.

Beth, not one to be showed up, tried but ended up wobbling too much to do it successfully.

Their laughter waved through the air the entire way into town like the sea breeze.

When they reached the small local grocery store they parked their bikes outside and walked in.

Beth picked through the produce section as Rick stood behind her with the shopping basket and the checklist.

The two worked as a team perusing through the store. Beth was planning on making pasta and needed some fresh veggies and a few other spices.

Once they were done shopping and checked out, putting the groceries in a canvas bag, the two walked around the small town.

They passed by a particularly bright yellow shop and Beth lit up, “Ohhh this ice cream shop used to be my favorite! Let’s get a cone!”

After buying their ice cream, they grabbed their bikes and found a comfortable spot in the shade. The two sat under a palm tree licking their ice cream cones. Their bikes and groceries laid in the grass nearby.

Once Rick finished his chocolate cone he laid down in the grass. Beth sat next to him still enjoying her strawberry scoop.

Rick closed his eyes for a second taking in the sea breeze and the overwhelming peace he felt here.

It was a beautiful place and being here with Beth made it perfect. Despite everything, being with her still felt like home.

Rick opened his eyes and turned to look at her. He was surprised to see that she had now finished her ice cream and was laid out in the grass an arms length away from him.

She looked like a painting laying in the yellow flower speckled grass. Rick found himself wishing he had artistic ability to draw her, but was sure he could never do her beauty justice.

So he snuck his phone out of his pocket and quietly took a picture of her. However, he forgot to turn the ringer off so his camera made an audible shutter sound startling Beth.

She turned her head towards him and gave him a playful glare, “Mmm you have to pay for my picture Rick.”

Rick laughed, “You’ll have to bill me.”

A peaceful pause drifted between the two.

“It’s beautiful here Beth. The sea is so blue and it’s amazing how the water just keeps going. It truly feels like it never ends.”

Beth looked at him curiously, “Have you seen the sea before?”

“Yes but it was a long time ago. Really haven’t been out of Blue Valley except to go to college since before my dad passed.”

Beth stared at him silently urging him to go on.

Rick continued, “My mom had to work really hard to support the both of us and she refused to let me get a job to help us out. She wanted me to focus on school as much as possible. So I did. I pushed myself to be the best I could be so I could make her proud. Make my dad proud. And since I got that scholarship it just opened up a lot for me. The money I had saved working odd jobs here and there I can now use to explore. It’s amazing how large the world is. I knew it was but you never really know till you see it.”

Beth smiled softly, “I’m so happy for you Rick. You deserve that scholarship and you more than deserve to see the world that you make better just by being yourself. A world you’re gonna save, Mr. Climate Crisis.”

Rick laughed at Beth, it was true his science degree had become more of an environmental science chemical engineering degree as he found himself increasingly interested in solving climate change.

“You’re too good to me Beth.”

“No... not nearly enough really.”

Rick rolled his eyes at her modesty, “Much much too good.”

The two had now turned towards each other in the grass.

Beth searched his eyes nervously, but then Rick turned back onto his back. Breaking the moment.

Beth turned back over as well, sitting up, “I guess we should head back now. Been out a bit longer than we should’ve.”

Rick sat up, “Yeah let’s go back.”

The two biked back silently deep in their own thoughts. Both of their thoughts ran in a circle through their heads.   
  


‘Im still in love with him.’

_‘Im still in love her.’_

‘But that’s never going to change. I know that.’

_‘Of course I am. I always will be.’_

‘But that didn’t stop us from hurting each other terribly.’

_‘We both have hurt each other so much.’_

‘Still, he’s my home. Anytime I’m with him I know I’m safe.’

_‘But then when I’m with her. The hurt we’ve caused each other pales in comparison to how happy she makes me.’_

‘But Solomon and Helen.’

_‘But Helen... and Solomon. But fuck Solomon honestly.’_

‘It’s too much right now. Doesn’t seem like the right time. Probably best to wait and just see what happens.’

_‘I’ll just wait. Maybe we just have to get the timing right this time. I don’t know’_

Their thoughts ran through their minds in a circle. Round and round and round like the wheels on their bikes until they screeched to a stop at Beth’s house.

The two were surprised to see Solomon standing in the front of the house.

He looked agitated. His arms were crossed in front of his chest.

He approached them coldly and took the canvas bag of groceries, “Took y’all long enough.” Then turned and headed into the house.

Beth looked anywhere except Rick as she parked her bike and headed into the house.

Their peaceful retreat was now over and Beth didn’t know what to expect from Solomon.

He’d never been so cold to her.

At dinner the five friends all sat at the outside table. The string lights and the ocean created a beautiful atmosphere that Beth hoped would improve the mood of the table.

After eating a bit she got up to go get glasses for the champagne she found in the kitchen. She picked the glasses that she remembered her dad loved.

They reminded her of the times when her father was actually a father to her.

When she brought the glasses back she placed them carefully on the table. Her concentration was almost broken by Solomon scoffing.

“Beth those aren’t even the right glasses for champagne.”

The table became quiet and Beth tried to deescalate the situation, not wanting to cause a scene.

“They are actually just an older style. They were my dad’s favorite.”

Solomon gave her an unsympathetic look and sarcastically replied, “Oh sorry babe didn’t realize it was such an emotional issue for you.”

The whole table remained quiet and Beth’s hand trembled slightly as she handed the glasses out to everyone, not looking anyone in the eye.

She grabbed the bottle pouring herself a glass before passing it to Joey and sitting back down in her seat next to Solomon.

She was stiff as a board and still refused to meet anyone in the eye. In an effort to just move past his comment Beth switched subjects, “So Joey how have you enjoyed the cross country trip?”

Joey perked up eager to help the mood of the table out and smiled, “Oh it’s been fantastic! Literally who would’ve known there’s so much damn grass in this country! I’ve seen more cows than buildings and as a NYC boy I love that.“

Beth laughed with him as did Rick and Bridget, but Solomon just stared at the smiling boy.

“See anything other than just cows?” He asked condescendingly.

“Well yeah we’ve seen LA, Salt Lake City, mountains with snow peaks in Colorado, Beale Street in Memphis, and a whole bunch of ‘worlds biggests’ along the way.”

“Where do you stay overnight? Just sleep in that car together?”

Joey gave Solomon a dirty look, “Well we actually have been staying in hostels. Provides a more authentic feel of the city.”

Solomon scrunched his nose in disgust, “Hostels! Fuck that must be rough.”

Not missing a beat Joey shook his head, “Actually it’s quite nice supporting small businesses. Plus it’s fun being able to see so much in an affordable way.”

Solomon all but scoffed, “Yeah but how much do you really see just flittering through cities? Seems to me that there’s no real substance to your travels.”

Joey rolled his eyes, “Oh yeah like all the substance your getting flittering around your girlfriends beach house for the whole summer.”

Beth who had been wracking her brain for how to calm Solomon down butted in, “Okay hey how about more champagne! Let’s make a toast for being halfway through college!”

Solomon picked up his glass roughly, raising it in the air, “Lets also make a toast to scholarships. Since some of us would not be here without one.”

With that comment Beth snapped. Displaying a rare moment of pure anger, “Seriously Solomon ? What the hell is wrong with you?”

Solomon placed his glass eerily calmly back on the table and then roughly pushed his chair back getting up and heading into the house.

Rick hands had been clenched so tightly he dug little moon shaped nail indents into his palms.

He looked at Beth whose eyes were teary and bore into his.

“I’m sorry.” she whispered to him.

Then she looked at all of them, “I’m really sorry. He’s just... there’s no excuse.”

Bridget spoke up defending her best friend, “Oh come on Beth. You can’t place the blame only on him. You couldn’t actually believe that bringing Rick here would go over well.”

Beth stared at Bridget with wide eyes surprised at the harsh words from her friend.

Beth nodded sadly and walked in the house, “I’m gonna go try to talk to him.”

Rick watched Beth walk away before looking back at Bridget coldly, “This is Beth’s home. She can invite whoever the hell she wants to. And no matter how he feels about me he has no excuse for how he’s talked to her today.”

Bridget looked at him defiantly before pouring herself more champagne, “Whatever. Cheers to this shit show.”

Joey glanced at Rick worriedly. They could hear Beth and Solomon arguing in the kitchen.

Rick sat pensively trying to decide whether or not he should go inside to make sure nothing happened when suddenly he heard Beth scream in frustration.

Immediately Rick was up and in the house ignoring Bridget’s plea to wait.

Beth and Solomon were in the kitchen on opposite sides of the small space.

Solomon was holding one of Beth’s dad’s champagne glasses.

Rick glanced over Beth making sure she was okay, “Are you alright?”

Beth nodded grimly as Solomon smiled maliciously.

“Ah great your here! Cheers” Solomon raised his empty glass staring at him and then Beth coldly before dropping the glass on the ground. It‘s shattered pieces covered the floor.

Beth launched at him angrily but Rick grabbed her pulling her away from the situation.

Solomon laughed at Beth’s anger, as Rick continued to pull her back outside.

Rick led Beth back to the patio and down to the beach.

It was slightly cool now and dark. Dark to the point where they could barely see the ocean right ahead, the only evidence of it was the crash of the waves against the shore and the peak of the tide washing in.

As soon as they got to the beach Beth walked ahead of Rick, wrapping her arms around herself and walking right up to the waves crashing in.

She had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to walk into the ocean, the dark abyss she couldn’t even see right now, and let it pull her in.

Beth wrapped her arms around herself and burst into tears.

Rick was deeply concerned. He stood behind Beth, but when she started to cry he turned her around and pulled her into his arms.

Beth buried her head into his chest and sobbed. The sound of the waves just barely covering the sad sound of her cries.

Rick rubbed his hands up and down her back soothingly until she calmed down.

After her tears had slowed down, Rick pulled away a little and sat down in the sand pulling Beth down with him.

Rick pulled Beth in between his outstretched legs, and let her lean back into him, his arms wrapped around her. They sat just close enough to the water so the tide would brush up against their feet when it rolled in.

The periodic crashing of water slowly brought them both back to a peaceful state of mind.

After some time Beth broke the silence whispering tiredly, “I don’t even feel like going back. I can’t look at him or deal with any of this anymore.”

Rick pressed his head into her shoulder, forcing himself not to kiss her exposed neck before whispering “We can stay out here tonight if you want.”

Beth nodded, then moved from between Rick’s legs and laid down next to him.

Rick laid down as well and the two stared at the cloudy night sky above.

No moon was in sight tonight but every once in a while Beth could make out a star.

They laid next to each other, shoulders slightly touching.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Beth whispered exhausted, “I can’t ever seem to make people love me. Or if they ever did it never seems to last long.”

Rick’s heart broke at her words, “Beth... plenty of people love you. Me, Court, Yolanda, Joey, my mom, your parents and so many more.”

Beth breathed shakily, “My parents don’t love me. I know you’ve seen how my dad is. But it’s more than just alcoholism. Neither her nor my mom care about me. I’ve talked to my mom maybe two times this whole year? I text her once a week just to let her know I’m alive but she basically never responds.”

Beth paused struggling to push back tears, “When I told her I wanted to come home to Blue Valley this summer to try to help dad she practically begged me to not come home. She sent me the key to the vacation home and told me to stay here. Told me that she’d try to get dad to come stay with me here instead.”

Rick reached for her hand holding it in his, “Well I went along with it. It’s been over a month now and I’ve heard nothing from either of them.”

Tears streamed down the sides of Beth’s face as she continued to stare up at the sky.

Rick fully turned his body towards Beth wiping the tears from her face, “I’m so sorry Beth. I didn’t know this was going on. I wish you’d told me.”

Beth hesitantly glanced at him her lip wobbling before looking back up to the sky, “I guess... I guess I just didn’t want you to think I was damaged goods.”

Rick shook his head no fiercely, tears welling up in his own eyes to know that she could ever believe he could think about her that way, “No Beth. Never. Jesus.. come here.”

He pulled her to him so that their foreheads leaned against each other. He laid like that for a second before moving his head up to press a long kiss on her head.

Rick’s lips moved from her forehead and ghosted over the side of Beth’s face moving down her cheek and chin. Being this close to her consumed all his thoughts. All he could think about was her.

Rick pulled back to look at Beth. The soft brown eyes that he couldn’t stare at without somehow falling impossibly more in love bore into his. Then, finally, he pressed his lips against her’s. Beth kissed him back slowly, savoring the feeling of his lips against hers. She brought her hands up to rub the nape of his neck softly.

Rick groaned at the feeling of kissing Beth and her soft hands on him. He pulled her waist further into him.

The darkness of the night covered their intimate actions and the waves drowned out the sounds of their lips meeting and soft sighs.

They kissed like this for a while until Beth felt Rick’s hand slide down to the bottom of her dress and begin pushing it up.

The action brought her back to reality.

Beth shook her head no and pulled away from him, “We shouldn’t.”

Rick rolled back over on his back pulling away, ‘Oh fuck. Fuck.’

He rubbed his hands over his face, “Shit. I’m sorry.”

Beth reached over and grabbed one of his hands squeezing it, “It’s okay.”

She let go of him and turned on her side, facing away from him.

Rick continued to stare up at the sky, seeing now that more stars had appeared. Beth laid her head on her arm staring out at the beach that seemed to go on forever ahead of them.

The sound of the waves, and the comforting presence of each other, slowly lured them both to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! Writing this felt like writing a dream. If you’ve ever been to the ocean at night you know how other worldly it seems. I tried to encapsulate that serene enchanted feeling despite the chaos of this chapter. Let me know how you’re feeling/what you’re thinking in the comments below 🤍


	8. Blue Valley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This hiatus 😩 I’m sorry friends! School came for me and I didn’t expect it to. Plus this chapter itself just took forever for me to write. It’s the penultimate chapter so a lot of things were getting tied up and I wanted to make it all make sense which took me longer than I thought. Anyway! Excuses, excuses it’s finally here and I hope it’s worth the wait ❤️

_3 weeks later_

_Dear Beth,_

_I hate to admit it but you’re right. Getting your letters has been the highlight of most of my weeks this summer. There really is something about opening a mailbox and seeing a handwritten note from you. Even though we text, the letter are still really special to me._

_I hope you are taking care of yourself in Florida. I know you are more than capable of looking after yourself but I can’t help but worry. I know we haven’t really talked so much about it since you first told me, but I want you to know that you don’t have to hide how your feelings about breaking up with Solomon from me. It’s no surprise to anyone that I really didn’t like him, but I know you cared about him. I’m here for you no matter what._

_Thanks for asking about Helen. She’s doing fine. Though we have kind of grown distant due to the long distance. I wish I could say I miss her more but I know what missing someone feels like and this doesn’t feel like that. I don’t know what that means but that’s just the truth._

_I wish you’d come to Blue Valley for a bit. I want to see you. My mom really wants to see you too. She asks about you pretty much everyday. I’d say she wants to see you more than I even do but I don’t think that’s possible. She told me you are always welcome to stay with us. I’ll happily let you sleep in my bed and I’ll take the couch or the floor whatever you’re comfortable with._

_I wanted to save this for last because I know you’d be too estatic to focus on anything else I said... I got the virtual fellowship job!_

_*Here’s your pause to totally jump for joy*_

_I think I can 100_ % _attest my success to you. I know you told me to stop saying it, but seriously thank you so much for editing my cover letter and application questions. I really think your suggestions made all the difference. So now ‘the’ Rick Tyler will be doing a virtual internship with the international branch of BetterEarth Inc. working with environmental scientists for the next 2 months in London! Who would’ve known a small town boy from Nebraska could be doing this._

_Looking forward to hearing from you soon._

_Yours,_

_Rick_

_p.s. I tried to recreate the brownie recipe you sent and lowkey failed. It was edible though. Just like really hard. I’ll try again soon._

* * *

_Dear Rick,_

_OH MY GOD you can’t imagine how happy I am for you!!! This is so exciting and so deserved! 1000% the best news I’ve heard in a long time. Definitely made my whole month! I must hear all the updates about your work ASAP!_

_Im glad to hear you’re enjoying the letters. It’s been the highlight of my weeks as well._

_I am trying to take care of myself. But I’ll be honest with you I haven’t really been feeling entirely like myself lately. There are pockets of time when that energy that has always been in me comes back. Like when I receive a letter from you or when I learn how to make a particularly awesome recipe. But most of the time I feel numb. I don’t really feel like cooking as much, the sea water doesn’t feel the same between my toes, emails from Dr. McNider don’t thrill me as much as they used to. Sometimes that numbness is actually comforting. It’s also dulled the pain._

_Im not really so sad about Solomon anymore. A part of me knew we would never really work out, but he was my friend. My first friend in college. I think about all the good he’s done for me and wonder how we could’ve strayed so far. It hurts to think that we can’t even salvage that friendship anymore and that I also lost Bridget from the fall out as well. I’ve tallyed the people in my life that have stayed versus the people that left and I sometimes wonder if maybe something is wrong with me._

_I started doing a little bit of googling to see if I could find some articles to read about how I’ve been feeling. Interestingly, many of the links suggested that I should try to seek some therapy. I’ve never really thought about therapy before but I figured it was worth a try. So I scheduled teletherapy with a therapist that has an office near campus in Chicago. Talking to a therapist is not really at all how I expected it to be so far. I expected her to immediately be trying to tell me what’s wrong with me. Instead during the first two sessions she just listened. My first day she asked me what brought me to her. I spent almost_ _the entire time talking to her about literally everything. She let me talk on and on and on. Sometimes she’d pause me to challenge my perception of an event. But other than that she just let me talk. And then at the end she told me that she wanted me to come back in a few days and talk to her some more. So that’s what I’ve been doing two times a week I just unload on her._ _This is my third week and I’m slowly starting to feel some real benefits. I’m recognizing my own feelings more and trying to stop my own toxic thoughts. I can now recognize that I have some problematic views of my own life but its been hard to stop believing those so instead I’ve been unpacking them. Both with Dr. Midnight and by myself._

_Something talking to her helped me realize is that for the last few years in many ways you’ve been like a therapist for me. Or you’ve tried your best to be. You’ve always been so good to me and good for me. No matter what I always knew in my heart I could count on you. Now talking with Dr. Midnight I realize that you have helped me and still help me in immeasurable ways, but I still definitely needed to talk to a professional._

_About Blue Valley... my mom actually finally reached out to me last week and asked me to come home. But I told her no. She was surprised to hear me say that. I almost always have done everything to please her but therapy has helped me realize that my mom is really linked to a lot of my toxic beliefs so I just can’t see her right now. Not with the state I’m in._

_I think I’m going to stay at the beach till the start of the school year. I would love to see you and your mom again but_   
_I just don’t think I’m ready to go back to Blue Valley. Tell your mom I miss her too. Give her a hug for me. And im counting the days till we can reunite again at school for our junior year._

_Had to say again that Im so proud of you Rick. You’re going to do amazing!_

_Love,_

_Beth_

_p.s. brownies can be finicky! keep trying you’ll definitely get the hang of it :)_

* * *

_Dear Beth,_

_Im sorry to hear you’ve been feeling this way. I know what it’s like to feel numb and detached from the world. I felt like that for a while at the start of freshmen year. I didn’t know what to do with the feeling so I just tried to bury myself in my studies and it was really Joey’s persistence and seeing you again that slowly started to help me feel better and like myself again. All I’ve ever wanted was to be there for you Beth, so Im so happy that you feel that way about me. Its great that you started therapy and that it’s been helping._

_I just want to say that you are a good person. And I say that as someone that truly knows you. Even though people may treat you badly, and I even include myself in that, it does not mean that you deserve to be treated that way._

_I started my internship a few days ago. It’s been great so far, the work is really interesting and the people are very welcoming and supportive. Now I wish I could visit them or work in person there. The organization is amazing and they make London sound like a nice place to live._

_I understand and respect your decision to stay at the beach. I guess I’ll have to start counting the days too. If you do ever come to Blue Valley for some reason the offer to stay at mine stands for whenever you may arrive._

_Yours,_

_Rick_

* * *

_4 weeks later_

**“Beth it’s your father. He’s in the hospital. You need to come home now.”**

Those three sentences forced Beth to do what she had steadfastly been avoiding. Pack all her things and take the next flight to Blue Valley.

The entire way there she prayed and hoped that her dad was okay.

When Beth landed in the nearby big city airport she quickly grabbed her suitcase and ran to find a taxi to take her to the hospital.

As the taxi passed the familiar landmarks in Blue Valley Beth barely took in any of it. The churning feelings of anxiety, exhaustion, and stress drowned out everything else.

The hospital was cold and sterile. Beth had not been there in a long time. But the hospital workers immediately recognized her from the times she would visit her mom at work. They greeted her sympathetically and quickly brought her to her dad’s room.

Mr. Chapel was pale and asleep in bed. A tube pushed down his throat. Beth held her arms around herself as tears clouded her eyes.

“Beth.”

Beth turned around and saw her mom was in the corner chair staring at her sadly.

Her mom got up from the chair and approached Beth, before pulling her into a hug.

Beth had almost forgotten what a genuine hug from her mom like. She immediately melted into the hug and sobbed. She cried for her father, her mother, and their years of being a broken family.

When Beth finally separated from her mother she was surprised to see that her unflappable mother was tearing up too.

Beth moved to pull a chair by her fathers bed. She held his hand in her own.

“What happened?”

“His neighbor saw him through his window. He had passed out from alcohol poisoning and was choking on his own bile.”

Beth breathed shakily. Trying to process this information.

“It was close but they think he will be okay.”

Beth let out a breath of relief.

“Why haven’t you been home Beth?” Mrs. Chapel asked.

When Beth looked at her mom, she saw behind the prying question was a layer of blame.

‘I can’t believe this. Somehow she’s trying to find a way to blame me for this.’

“Mom please.”

“Seriously Beth! Look at your father! He needed you.”

Beth looked at her disgusted before snapping, “No he needed _you_! He needed you to see him for how broken he was and to send him to rehab! He needed professional help! Not the help of his 20 year old daughter! He needed you! _We_ needed you mom! But you will never EVER allow yourself to take the blame for anything. That’s one thing in my life I know will never change.”

Beth’s mom stared at her shocked at her outburst.

Beth looked away and back to her father, giving him a kiss on the forehead before getting up.

“I’m leaving. I can’t be around you right now. Just give me a call if there are any changes.”

Beth headed out into the hall. Her suitcase lugging behind her. She walked numbly to the front of the hospital.

When she got to the waiting area a voice called out to her breaking her from the fog.

“Beth!”

Beth glanced towards the waiting room. She felt her heart burst and her knees buckle at the familiar voice.

When she turned and saw him, tears of relief immediately filled her eyes.

Before she knew it, he was on her. His arms wrapped around her waist and hers around his as she buried her head into his chest.

The strong familiar earthy smell slowly grounding her.

‘ _Rick_.’

When she had the strength to pull away Beth reached a hand up to caress his face. She rubbed her thumb across the side of the beard he’d grown out.

He looked older but his eyes were the same beautiful eyes that bore into hers the first time they kissed.

“What are you doing here?” Beth whispered worried that something had happened.

“Small town. Didn’t take long for word to travel about what happened to your dad. I didn’t know if you would feel able to come back here or not, but I knew you’d probably want someone you trust to tell you what was going on. So I came by to check on him. But then when the nurse told me that you were here, I just waited for you to come back out.”

Beth had no words. All she could do was feel and overwhelming wave of immense love.

Everything in her wanted to kiss him but she forced herself not to and instead hugged him again, kissed his cheek and then separated.

“Thank you so much.” Beth finally had the strength to say.

“Of course. And If you want to stay at mine I’m pretty sure my mom is already changing the sheets in my room for you.”

Beth let out a small giggle.

Rick’s heart warmed at the sound.

“That sounds great Rick.”

Rick grabbed Beth’s luggage and pulled it out to his car for her.

When they both settled in the car Rick turned on his favorite old blues songs.

They hadn’t driven 10 minutes down the road before Beth reached over and turned the stereo off.

Rick looked at her curiously.

Beth held her hands together tightly before speaking, “I promised myself that the next time I saw you in person I would tell you how I truly feel. Because I’ve learned that denying my feelings doesn’t make them go away. And I’ve learned that verbalizing how I feel and not just hoping that things are understood is important as well. So I’m just going to say it.”

Beth squeezed her eyes shut before turning her body towards Rick’s.

“I love you Rick. _Im in love with you_. I think I have been since we first kissed in high school. And there were days over these past years when I prayed it would go away. But I’m so thankful that it didn’t and that it’s only grown stronger because loving you is a gift. Loving you got me through so much and has given me so much. And I know you’re with Helen now but I had to tell you. You’ve waited for me before and been a good friend to me while waiting. You’ve given me time to come back to you. So I will do the same thing for you. Even if in the end you only ever want to be friends, I’ll learn to accept that so I can continue to be in your life.”

Beth looked down at her intertwined hands and then looked back up at Rick. The silence of the car was deafening and Rick didn’t take his eyes off the road.

Suddenly, Rick made a quick jerk and pulled over on the side of the road and parked his car.

Beth stared at him curiously before Rick unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over pulling her to his lips.

Rick’s passionate kiss stole the breath away from Beth.

Before she could catch her breath Rick snatched it again, murmuring against her parted lips, “ _I love you Beth_. It’s never stopped. It won’t ever stop. I love you.”

Beth smiled against his lips and kissed him again. The warmth and happiness they both felt coursed through their bodies and emitted within the car.

‘This time. I think we got it right.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowowow can we just collectively say FINALLY!! Yes! Seems like maybe they got it right this time? I think so too. I hope you enjoyed please comment and leave kudos, it will give me the energy to finish this fic amongst all these assignments for school 😩💖


End file.
